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SUBSCRIBE to Simply Oloni to get the latest dilemmas sent to you FIRST 30. January 2016

Hi Oloni, I recently become closer with my friends boyfriend after I intially contacted me ask me whether I liked one of his friends. His gf knows we’ve been talking however it’s very clear he doesn’t tell her what we’ve been saying and brushes her off meaning she has to come to me to ask for screenshots etc. Some of the things he says to me are quite inappropriate (for someone who has a gf) and has sexual undertones ( told me to come to his house) but because we only speak online i was never too fussed about it, also his gf likes the fact he and I get on because he doesn’t care to speak to any of her other friends. But recently he’s said that it’d be good if we were to meet up “to say hi and stuff”, im not suggesting hes going to cheat (it takes two) but there are things he tells me that he admits he wouldn’t tell her because she’s judgey and has said that he’d take me to meet his mates/go raving (they’re ravers lol) but wouldn’t want her there….yeah it all kind of seems like hes trying to find bae number 2 which is his choice but I’m involved now and as much as I enjoy speaking to him I’m not sure what to do… should I tell her? Or should I just carry on being mates with him and if it gets hella dodgey tell him what’s up ?? (Another one of my theories was that he was trying to vibe me out for his friend/wingmaning) 30. January 2016

Yeah, the both of you are way too friendly. Yes, she’s probably happy that her bf is getting on with one of her friends for once, but there’s a huge line that you’re both crossing. You’re entertaining his nonsense, even though you can tell some of the things he’s saying seem inappropriate. You need to let her know that her boyfriend is being suggestive, but you also need to stop speaking to him. What I’m confused by is the screenshots you admitted your friend comes to you for??? So has she or she not seen his mess??? – If you like your friend you will distance yourself from her boyfriend. I get the feeling that he’s trying to create an emotional connection between you and him. All the ‘he wont tell her stuff because she’s too judgy’. etc. seems like BS to make you feel a particular way.

– Oloni

Hey oloni, how do I know if a guy is using me for sex? 30. January 2016

No guy is the same and may even go about it in different ways. The most obvious is if he’s asking you to come around and ‘chill’… If he hasn’t been clear with what he wants with you after several months and you’re just sleeping together, chances are he’s only in it for the physical. It really does vary, just pay attention to the red flags.

– Oloni

So I have this situation where I was seeing this girl for a couple of months, I was feeling her and enjoyed her company but it wasn’t anything serious. She was a bit hard to read but she always jumped at the opportunity to come and see me & vice versa, when we eventually slept together, she became distant and now we barely talk. Do I approach this situation with her or leave her be? 30. January 2016

I’d say you should reach out to her, especially since you were intimate. Give her a call and have an honest open conversation about things. Be direct and ask if she’s feeling you or not. You can’t read her mind, but you can ask question that give answers as to how she feels. Even if it’s not what you want to hear, at least you’ll know what’s up.

– Oloni

READ: For The Single Women On Valentine’s Day 30. January 2016

There are many times in a woman’s life where she will appreciate being alone but I think it is safe to say that even the most independent of women can’t turn a blind eye to Valentine’s Day – whether loved or loathed – it is undeniably hanging on the tip of tongues as we edge closer towards the date. Love is definitely in the air but during such a relationship-focused celebration where is a single woman’s place on Valentine’s Day?

If you scour the Internet you will be sure to find articles compiling a list of suggestions for a single woman to successfully navigate her way through Valentine’s Day unscathed. For example, treating … read more HERE

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