Ask me sex and relationship questions here anonymously. Please make questions as *brief* as possible to make sure you get a response. Please be aware that some dilemmas may be posted on social media platforms and cannot be removed on there or Ask Oloni once submitted. Not all questions sent can be answered due to the high amount received daily. For a QUICK response book aprivate callhere
Hi Oloni, my man left me for his child’s mother. We started off as friends then slowly our feelings grew. He wasn’t my type but I slowly fell for him and he told me he felt the same. He told me he has a daughter who was 9 months old when we met, in my mind I thought this was a bit young and I wondered what had happened there but he assured me they broke up and would never get back together. Anyway, just when we made it official I posted a pic of us on instagram and got a crazy DM of his child’s mother asking me why I’ve got pics of her man. I told him and he apologised saying she’s still in love with him and she’s just angry about us. I took his word and left it (thinking back I should of knew something was off from then) so we finally had sex for the first time and then his messages became fewer and fewer. He started ignoring calls and posting his child’s mother for Mother’s Day and her birthday and such, I called him and asked why all of a sudden he’s started doing that as he’d told me he hated her. He got really angry and shouted saying ‘so what if I wanna post my fucking bm what’s it got to do with you’ I said cool, he later apologised so again I thought nothing of it. 2 weeks later no contact (bare in mind this is my MAN) I see pics of him his daughter and his baby mum on HOLIDAY!! This is the first time I saw her oloni and tbh my heart sank. She is beautiful, a pretty face and a nice body. I’m hoping he just went back to her for her looks and maybe he’ll come back? Should I just accept this loss and move on? He told me he loved me and wanted to marry me but he’s completely fucked me off for her and I’m blocked on everything for now???? I’m crushed please help.
13. December 2017
Hey love, he’s said and shown you two different things. If this isn’t enough for you to move on, I don’t know what else will.
Oloni
Dear Oloni, So this guy that I’ve been talking to was with his ex for about five years. Basically two nights ago, I saw his friend and he told me that this guy and his ex broke up because she left to work in the states. But they were also close to getting married. I thought whatever because she’s gone right? Then he tells me she’s coming back to London to spend Christmas with her family and he’s invited. What should I do? Should I confront him or leave it?
13. December 2017
I would let this go if I were you.
Oloni
I have slept with 4 guys within the space of 3 months & now I’ve been given an sti. This could mean that the first guy probably gave it to me and now I’ve given it to the others. I am currently having causal sex with one of the boys and I don’t know what to do
13. December 2017
Have a scroll on the last two pages, I gave someone similar to your position some advice on what to do.
Oloni
Hi oloni, I cheated on my husband and now we’re divorced. I felt terrible and I know I shouldn’t have done it but I was a drunken mess and regret it. Ever since then he has hated me to my very core. Even at divorce proceedings he never wanted to be in the same room as me unless it was to sign documents. I feel a great hatred and disdain towards me when he looks at me. Almost like he’s plotting on me. Ever since then he’s taken it out on our kids. He stopped coming to see them, and doesn’t want anything to do with them. He pays his child maintenance and that’s it. I know I messed up but my mistake shouldn’t have to affect our kids like this. I’ve tried everything and have even begged just for him to take them out just at least once but he’s not interested. He doesn’t respond to texts or calls from me so I don’t know what to do. Any advice?
11. December 2017
Heya it sounds like he’s clearly dealing with some misplaced anger and starting to resent the family you both created. Your ex is struggling to cope with the divorce and the infidelity, however it’s not an excuse, not even close to one. I think you should find a way to send him a message about what you’ve noticed as this could really begin to affect your children and ultimately, they come first.
He may not feel it now, but he’ll regret not being there properly, especially if this is due to what happened between the two of you.
Visiting his kids shouldn’t be seen as a chore and hopefully he’ll realise this. I think you just have to be patient, this isn’t something you can force on him.
Hey Oloni. Who pays on couples trips or ‘baecations’?
11. December 2017
It really depends on age and your occupation in my opinion. I wouldn’t expect my 20 year old male readers to finance a 2 week trip away for him and his girlfriend of 6 months.
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