I’ve been on an off with this boy for 5 years now, I’m 20 next year. We was serious for two then I left him cause he cheated on me and I turn the spiteful and slept with one of his friends. Since then he’s had a girlfriend who he claims to love and is with her but still calls me often and tells me he loves me and misses me, we still see each other time to time and sometimes have sex. It’s breaking me I love him but I can’t be like this I don’t know what I should do. I acknowledge so far what we have been doing is wrong and I’ve asked for him to leave her a few times every time he says no but is begging me not to leave him. How am I meant to move on from someone who won’t let me go but has a girlfriend?
7. October 2015
He’s having his fun because you’re allowing him to, he’s already said he won’t leave her and 9/10 men who are in relationship and cheat won’t end the relationship, unless they’ve been caught. You need to cut him out completely. Try going under the no contact rule, because you’re not only having sex with him, you’re still clearly emotionally attached. It’s unhealthy and the longer this carries on.. well the harder it becomes and the deeper your feelings will grow.
Hi Oloni, I go out and guys will ask for my number. We get to the texting stage and they’re either not good at texting or we get on really well but they stop texting me out of nowhere. What am I doing wrong?
7. October 2015
Try attending new places…you’re probably running into/giving your number to the same guys. Instead of texting try communicating via regular phone calls.
Hello Oloni I’ve been reading through your dilem mas and really value your advice. I also feel you are the only person who can help me with my problem as your advice will be objective. I started university recently and feel like I’ve grown as a person however I left things back home in a bad way with my ex boyfriend who used to be one of my close friends it’s been over a year now but I feel like I should apologise for what I did not in the hope to form a relationship just so he knows I’m sorry and do I clear my concious. I’ve tried to get in touch with him but hasn’t responded I’ve stopped trying as I don’t want to be a pest. Does him not responding mean anything ? Shall I try again ? Let it go ?Thank you
7. October 2015
He might be ignoring you, but it’s good that you want to reach out and apologise. I’m all for clearing things up between ex lovers but I wouldn’t suggest calling all texting. Perhaps an email? He doesn’t have to respond, but just understand and accept what your intentions have been so you can move on.
when is your next speed dating event?
7. October 2015
Hi Oloni, I was on and off with my ex for about 2 years. We still talk and I still love him, but recently he told me he was now with somebody else. I was hurt but I thought it would be better to respect his new relationship and give him some space. However he still insists on making contact with me all the time and tells me how beautiful I’m looking. I don’t know whether to cut off all contact with him or try and remain friends.
7. October 2015
I think keeping a respectable distance would be best. Just think how you would feel if your new boyfriend had this same interaction with his ex girlfriend?
Subscribe To Our Newsletter
Sign up to our mailing list to read our sex and relationship features first.
You have Successfully Subscribed!