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Ask me sex and relationship questions here anonymouslyPlease make questions as *brief* as possible to make sure you get a response. Please be aware that some dilemmas may be posted on social media platforms and cannot be removed on there or Ask Oloni once submitted. Not all questions sent can be answered due to the high amount received daily. For a QUICK response book a private call here

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I’m 26 and seeing this guy from work who is 39. We have been dating for 2 months and he has 2 kids which he only told me about recently. Its slightly put me off but he’s reassured me that I don’t need to be a step mum and that his ex wife is completely out of his life. They only speak when he goes to see his kids. He treats me sooo well and I have already met some of his friends and family. I really like him but I discussed with my Mum and she’s totally against it. I don’t know whether we should still pursue with this relationship because my mum and others don’t approve but I really am falling for him and treats me like a queen. Help! 4. October 2015

If you want to continue dating him, date him, but remember it’s only been 2 months.. it’s still very early, so don’t be too infatuated. You’re an adult so you’re allowed to date whoever you want no matter how old they are. Make sure you’re asking him the right questions …such as how long he’s been divorced etc.


Hi oloni, I’m white and my boyfriends black. He’s become socially aware and is now woke. I have no issue with this its just that He’s been tweeting about how we need to protect our black queens and he posts pictures of other women on Twitter, It’s made me feel uncomfortable he also laughs when people mock white peoples lips and although my lips aren’t thin they aren’t thick either and i just feel like he’s taking jabs at my life and wants to end our relationship. I really love him just his socially media persona upsets me. I don’t know what to do, any advice? And Could you make this QOTD 1. October 2015

I’ll make this a #QOTD but my personal advice is that you need to talk to him about it. If it offends you, you have to remind him that these things do upset you and it’s understandable. He can become as woke as hell, but he also needs to remember not to be insensitive towards the woman he’s with. Communication is always key!


Hi Oloni, I am with my boyfriend for over a year now. At the start of the relationship he wasn’t upfront about his feelings for me maybe because it wasn’t so strong. This made me worried for a while. But as of late he has been affectionate and open about his feelings. I feel sort of two ways about this. Is he genuine? Why now? Do I enjoy the new found passion for me or do I keep questioning it? 1. October 2015

You’re totally over thinking it, sometimes these things take time. We all move at different paces when it comes to opening up, he’s clearly finally let his guard down and feels more comfortable to do so. My advice? Don’t question it, be happy!


I’m a 20 year old aspiring filmmaker at uni and my boyfriend (just over a year) is 25 and has a part time job in retail. He’s been to jail before and he has no ambition besides staying out. He doesn’t want to progress in his job or to look into a better career path, what do I do??? 1. October 2015

You know deep down what you need to do, if he’s shown you he has no ambition, you’re not going in the same direction so cut him loose.


I’ve been speaking to a guy and on the first date he brought me out to dinner , I feel like I’ve led him on and he got ahead of himself by asking me where it’s going to lead to ? Atm I don’t want anything serious I’m just having fun but he said he wanted something serious how do I break him down easily 1. October 2015

If you don’t want anything serious let him know politely. You don’t have to continue seeing him just because you went out. It;s good he;s letting you know he’d like something serous, but he’s moving way too fast.


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