Hello Oloni Am 21 and my bestie is 27 We met on Twitter 3years ago n got talking… When we first started talking ,I personally friend zoned him Then we got to meet and we had sex and we kept having Sex and if hook him up with my friends and we would keep having Sex but whenever he is into someone , I get real tight like mad… The last issue we had he was asking me what exactly was my problem that it seems that I don’t want anything good for me that every girl he dates I don’t like them… That what do I want him to do? And I said nothing… That it’s ok… Now me I dunno oh I dunno whether it’s love but something is wrong with me, please what is it???
29. December 2015
You’re jealous and this relationship you have with your bestie doesn’t seem practical
Hi oloni I started seeing this guy during the summer for 3/4 months and it was going well, until I asked what his attention were of what’s going on. I just didn’t want to waste my time. His answer was he is not looking for one because he has a lot going on with uni work exams and all that so I backed off. The convo continued but was not the same. I missed it so much that I tried to keep the convo flowing but it didn’t work so I left it. Two weeks ago I went to a club and he was their, he approached me and asked how everything is going and that he is getting time off that we should meet. We are going to but I don’t know if I should take him up on his offer or should I leave it alone because he doesn’t want a relationship. The amount of people who said yh I did the right thing to ask and some said you scared him. I need your advice please.? I still like him
29. December 2015
You didn’t scare him off, you just found out what he didn’t want, which was to take things up a level. 3-4 months is enough time.
Hi Oloni, I’m seeing a guy that is older than me (8 years to be precise, I’m 22) he’s nice and all but I find him patronising sometimes. Like he’ll tell me to grow up when we argue and that really irratates me because I personally think for my age I’m quite mature. I’ve addressed that issue but it’s on going. Also he wants a relationship but when I told him I don’t want one just yet. We clearly want different things (he’s looking to settle I’m just not there yet especially as I’m still getting over an ex, he was my first love) I told him I’m not ready but he felt a type of way. What should I do?
29. December 2015
You clearly both want different things. If I were you, I’d let this relationship go!
Hi Oloni, I have been with my boyfriend and a while now and about 3 months ago we found out that I was pregnant. Although shocked at the time due it being unplanned we were both excited. I wasn’t prepared for how much my body was going to change and since I’ve started to show I’ve started to feel insecure and less attractive to him, I’m usually very fit and active but the first trimester was really hard on me and I struggled to keep up my regular gym routine. Now I’m 4 months pregnant my energy levels are back to normal, but now sex is non existent, it’s been like this since my baby bump started to appear. Every time we get physical he stops or makes a comment about the baby or just kisses or cuddles me. Not only has this added to me feeling secure about how attractive I am now but it’s also got me questioning whether he feels the same anymore. I don’t know what to do as he’s insisted he loves me and he is still affectionate, but sleeping in the same bed with no sex for this long is odd to us. Please help me!
28. December 2015
I once worked at Mother and Baby Magazine so I read about situations like this a lot. What you’re going through is absolutely normal for soon to be mothers. Try to spark things back in the bedroom by buying new lingerie, it helps set a the mood for sex. There are plenty of maternity brands out there that create sexy lingerie so have a google and treat yourself. Another thing I’d advise is to communicate outside of the bedroom and let him know exactly how you feel. Talk about how you’re doing emotionally and physically even if he is a very loving partner, it’s important for him to know how his girlfriend and mother of his child is feeling. You should also ask how he is..It’s not unheard of for men to get worried about hurting the baby when having sex, they too also have a lower libido around this period, but remember being intimate isn’t just about sweaty sex you can try different things, such as oral pleasure, masturbating, massages and so much more. That’s the beauty of sex, there are various activities you can try out. I hope this helps.
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