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Hi Oloni congrats on everything! So basically i’m a female and i love sex but I have no interest in being in a relationship at present. I find that having one regular partner leads to feelings & complications but i also fear having sex (although safe) with different men will ruin my chances of settling down when i’m ready as it’s not in my nature to lie to potential partners. I also don’t feel like having sex with old partners just for the sake of preserving my bodycount. I’m not sure what the right thing to do is?
28. September 2016
The tip I’d give here is to only have sex with your friend with benefits, a lot of people go on dates with the dude they’re sleeping with or hang out with them, then wonder how they got so attached.
It’s all about understanding the type of person you are too, so if you feel like sleeping with someone continuously is going to set off emotions you didn’t know you had, you might just want to lean away from this option in general and perhaps stick to masturbation.
Oloni
Oloni, ive been going on dates with this guy who claims single but still lives with his babymum who has just had a second child for him who isnt even up to 3 months old. Ive wanted him for years now but i feel bad, i mean if he says hes not with her who am i to say he is, we also recently sex, am i the mistress or is he genuinely trying to be with me?
28. September 2016
If you don’t mind sharing him, then carry on doing whatever it is your doing. A single man is very unlikely to live with the mother of his child after not one but TWO kids I think you know the answer to this question.
Oloni
Hey girl, so about 3 years ago I was seeing this guy, everything was great he was soooo mature and such a gentleman. He always made me feel beautiful even though at the time I thought I wasn’t because I had problems with my weight. So we were seeing each other for a few months and I gained proper feelings for him, one day I was scrolling through Instagram and a girl posted a picture of him and her together and quoted it “power couple” ? When I confronted him he ignored me. So now 3 years on he’s back, he says he wants something serious with me, he seems really genuine but I don’t know if I can trust him. Do you think I should give him a chance or am I being stupid?
28. September 2016
You’re being stupid. He had a girlfriend then ignored you, now he’s back? What for?
Oloni
I was in a relationship for 7 years and it ended in December due to many reasons including long distance etc. I fell into a pattern of meaningless sex with guys I actually liked and now 10 months after the breakup I met a great guy with all a girl could ask for (job, his own house, caring, complete gentleman etc). We only met 2 weeks ago but he’s already telling me he knows what he wants and its me..he wants a future with me and wants to skip the boyfriend/girlfriend thing and be full on intense. Ok my issue is I have found basically what most girls want but I don’t know how to tell him it’s all a bit fast or am I just scared to commit? He’s amazing but I don’t find myself yearning for him like I have other guys in the past and Oh..he wants to wait till marriage to have sex (which is a completely new concept to me). I hope this makes sense..I’m just in a funk at the moment. Thanks
28. September 2016
Hey girl! It sounds like he hasn’t given you a chance to take in this new relationship, that’s why the boyfriend and girlfriend stage is necessary to many. It’s great he knows he wants to be with you, but in order for you to jump the broom with him, you have to feel the same, or it’ll be a very one sided relationship. Have a chat with him and just express how you feel. Marriage is a serious and big commitment, so it’s best if you both take some time.
Oloni
Hi Oloni. I’m a 28 year old Virgin and recently started an old boyfriend again. This time he’s talking marriage (he’s 40) and supposed to find meet my family in two months. We’ve discussed our future and agreed that we’ll start having kids immediately after getting married but I want to enjoy sex for a bit before getting pregnant. Do you think it’s ok if I start having sex now or should I just wait?
28. September 2016
Hey girl, it’s totally up to you. Do what you feel you’re ready for. If that’s waiting a while before having kids with your partner then do that. Just let him know how you feel so he understands what’s running through your mind.
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