Ask Oloni

@aggyabby

Ask me sex and relationship questions here anonymously. Please make questions as *brief* as possible to make sure you get a response. Please be aware that some dilemmas may be posted on social media platforms and cannot be removed on there or Ask Oloni once submitted. Not all questions sent can be answered due to the high amount received daily. For a QUICK response book a private call here

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Hi Oloni, I’m going to try keep this short. My fiancé/ boyfriend of over 7 years has cheated on me. But that’s not all, he got her pregnant 21. October 2016

I’ll rewrite that for you ‘Hi Oloni, I’m going to try keep this short. My ex-fiancé/ ex-boyfriend of over 7 years has cheated on me. But that’s not all, he got her pregnant and I’m moving on with my life, because I deserve better. Way better.’

READ: Sex And The Secrets: With Interest

Hi Oloni my i told my boyfriend i wasnt ready to have a child out of wedlock so we always make love with a condom..Recently he nutted in me and i got so upset because we had spoken about this. He said he was sorry and that he got carried away.. I forgave him and he gave me postinor 2 i had never used it before few days later my period came though it wasnt yet time ..it came for a few days and came after a week again i am pissed and angry what does this mean?? 21. October 2016

Wait, so he took off the condom? If he did that is a huge violation of trust, especially if he knows how you feel and that’s exactly why you’re annoyed about all of this. You had the discussion with your partner about children and even practice safe sex, so he had no reason to do what he did. I’ll be very honest, your boyfriend sounds crazy. Who the hell does that? Him getting the morning after pill still doesn’t cut it when the act has already been done. He had no right do that especially when you never said he could. I would suggest you go to a sexual health clinic for a follow up and a test. I also think you need to pause this relationship completely, ‘I got carried away’ is not an excuse to potentially get someone pregnant, what he did was very serious.

Oloni

My boyfriend of 3 years has recently become very protective particularly over what I wear. I can’t wear leggings, tight dresses etc and if I do it’s almost implied that he will ‘get back at me’ (ie doing something far more serious). He’s really knocking my confidence whenever I wear a nice outfit all I hear is criticism. What should I do? 21. October 2016

Hey hun, your boyfriend shouldn’t be policing your outfits, especially when it’s knocking down your confidence. The first question running through my mind is, ‘does he know?’ – You need to have a conversation because what you allow now, will only continue in the future. Someone who wants to be with you should never want to result to spite. He is being completely spiteful. It’s unfair and wrong on so many levels. I would also tell you to have a think about this relationship deeply because this also seems like a red flag.

Oloni

Me and my boyfriend have been together for almost a year. He’s never cheated on me but I his phone rang it was his friend and I went through his messages. He was explaining to his guy friends at work how this girl who sits at another desk is fine af and he wants to smash. After I tell him I found out he says it’s just ” guy talk”. Should I leave his stupid ass? 21. October 2016

He is stupid… but I wouldn’t tell you to leave his stupid ass.. yet. Tell him how it made you feel and in the words of Kylie Jenner, allow him to ‘realise’ how inappropriate his words were. It’s disrespectful when a guy in a relationship talks like that behind his girls back especially about a colleague. This isn’t even a celebrity, the girl he’s talking about literally works with him. How’d he feel if it was the other way around?

Oloni

Dear Oloni, I am 27 years old and I have been married to my husband who is 27 for a year and prior to that we both decided we would wait to have sex before marriage. We have known each other for years and have a wonderful relationship. But there is one problem. I don’t believe in any sort of contraception due to my Christian beliefs. My husband does not agree with this as he does not want to face the prospects of having a child when he is not ready. I understand he may think that there is a chance that I could get pregnant every single year but there is a very slim chance that could happen as majority of women tend to have their second child 2-3 years after their first child. We are married and therefore the whole idea of using contraception is not an option for me at all (in this case so that we don’t unexpectedly have a child). He has now refused to have sex with me because of this and quite frankly I find this quite silly and extreme. I didn’t think this would be an issue hence the reason why I didn’t bring it up before marriage. What’s your thoughts on this? 21. October 2016

Hey girl, you and your husband should have really spoken about this even if you didn’t think it was important. I’m sure you must have spoken about sex a few times. You could have used that moment to slip in your beliefs surrounding contraception. Did you tell your husband that you wanted to live in a house full of kids by the age of 35? Because that’s what’s going to happen if you don’t let him wear a condom hun. Who wants to take a pregnancy tests every week after sex? You need to think long and hard about what you’re saying and doing because this could play a negative part in your relationship if you don’t have sex responsibly.

Oloni

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