Ask me sex and relationship questions here anonymously. Please make questions as *brief* as possible to make sure you get a response. Please be aware that some dilemmas may be posted on social media platforms and cannot be removed on there or Ask Oloni once submitted. Not all questions sent can be answered due to the high amount received daily. For a QUICK response book aprivate callhere
A few years ago I met this guy and clicked instantly with him. After a couple of days getting to know him I found out he had a girlfriend. We carried on being friends as normal and would even say he wanted me to meet her. One day he wanted to hang out so I met up with him. We ended up having sex. After he said it can’t happen again but it did for over a year until I found a really nice genuine guy. I cut off all contact with the first guy. Until he messaged me almost a year after we stopped talking to say he missed me and wanted to see me and show me his daughter when she’s born!!!! Understandable I freaked a bit and my feelings got all confused. I haven’t seen him but we talk and he try’s to convince me to see him saying he misses me still. I miss him too but happy in my relationship. I’m torn before my lust for the old guy and my love for my boyfriend. It’s very difficult for me to let this guy go
30. November 2016
It just sounds like you’re being selfish if I’m honest. If you’re in love with someone, lust with someone else should not be a factor or have you pondering on whether or not you should meet up with with an ex-flame.
Oloni
Oloni i messed up!! I have been seeing this guy for two months, I know it’s not a long time but he was literally so different to any guy i have been with before. He was so caring and attentive, constantly telling me how beautiful he thought I was and how much he liked me and was so keen to introduce me to all hid friends and family. Anyway long story short I went out to a club with him and his friends and ended up getting WAAY too drunk and acting like a complete idiot. I shouted at him in the club for no reason, then cried about it and worst of all i broke in to his house at the end of the night, as in broke the door to his apartment to get in (probably the worst thing i have ever done). I really don’t know what happened to me because i am honestly never usually like that but I acted like a complete psychopath and scared him off. I appologised so much and he’s a really genuine guy so he answered my messages and said it was alright and he’s over it. But i know he’s not, he’s acting completely different- doesn’t want to hang out, keeping the conversations to small talk and just being generally really distant. Of course I understand how unacceptable my behaviour was and he has every right to be upset, but it was going so well before i just want things to go back to how they were. Do you think there is anything I can do to make this better? Or is it a lost cause and I should move on with my life?
30. November 2016
Yeahhh this was a bit scary, you damaged his property and that’s not okay hun.
I would suggest you ask to meet up with him and have a one to one chat, to see if he’s still interested in dating you. If he still gives awkward replies or avoids meeting up, just know you have to let this one go. You don’t want to be with someone who you feel like you’re forcing to talk to you.
Oloni
I was dating a guy. It was very casual at first. I then found out he was married. He claimed his marriage was over and didn’t tell me because he wanted to live out first. I gave him the benefit of the doubt. Months passed, nothing happened. He then said he was scared of publically announcing he had failed in his marriage. I told his wife because even though I told him to concentrate on his marriage I knew I would still sleep with him. I then found out I was pregnant and miscarried. He is all over the place. I’m not sure where that leaves us.
30. November 2016
This is such a messy scenario and you need to stay away from him. It also seems like you have a of healing to do. Give yourself space from this guy, it’s becoming unhealthy.
Oloni
Hey Oloni my boyfriend keeps telling me that i would be so much penger if i joined the gym. it’s now concerning me because he brings it up almost everytime we are on the phone or we speak. he himself is an active gym goer/ fitness enthusiast and i have what many would call a nice body i guess (round breasts, flat tummy / slim waist , big bottom, thick thighs) but naturally as a woman i have insecurities such as stretch marks, cellulite etc… I don’t want this to get me down and i’m not sure if my boyfriend is advising me from a place of love or control…. how could i approach a conversation with him to let him know i’m feeling this way? please help x
22. November 2016
It really depends on his delivery… I’m not in your relationship so I can’t tell what place it’s coming from, but if I’m honest from what you’ve said, I think he just wants his girlfriend in the gym with him. I doubt it’s malicious, especially if you have a great body already. Talk to him about it if it is bothering you.
Oloni
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I was talking to this American boy that lives just outside of London we met twice and we stopped talking. I then added him on snapchat and he told me he missed me and invited me over. I drove an hour and a half, we got drunk and had sex. And the next day he told me he regretted it…and deleted me. What do I do? I actually love this guy. And he was telling me how he wants us to have kids in the future. I understand he has a stable job (firefighter) and doesn’t need a woman… Shall I move on:( I spoke to him and he doesn’t seem interested..
22. November 2016
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