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Hi Oloni. I’m engaged & haven’t had sex with my partner as we are waiting until marriage. It’s been nearly 3 years since we got together so it’s been hard to wait but I know it’s helped us as our emotional, mental and spiritual connection is amazing. However, he is a virgin whilst I’ve had sex with 2 previous partners. We are getting married soon and I know he is nervous as he thinks he won’t know what he’s doing. I’ve explained we have the rest of our lives to figure out how we like to do things in the bedroom, but do you have any first time tips that you think could help him feel comfortable. I love him so much so I just want to make sure our sex life starts as good as possible. 8. June 2018

Congratulations!! I think it’s beautiful you’ve both decided to wait. It also shows other people reading this, that they too can be celibate or abstain till they’re ready.

As you mentioned you have the whole of your lives to understand what the other enjoys sexually, so my advice is to be patient with yourselves. If it doesn’t feel like fireworks the first time do not worry, being fairly new to sex will not make you an expert. You might have a few hiccups, you might also have so much chemistry that you hit it off well the first time.

See it as a sexual journey for both of you. Enjoy foreplay before becoming intimate. I can’t emphasise enough how important it is. Without foreplay, there is no real sex. Invest time into learning about each others bodies, so you can both understand what turns you on.

Try getting a small vibrator for clitoral pleasure, water based lubricant and condoms.

Enjoy!

Oloni


Hey oloni, it’s a long story so imma make it quick. There’s this guy I’ve liked for yearrrsssssssss, been strategically positioning myself for time. My sister has come out of a long relationship and is newly single and this guy has moved to her instead. She knew how much I liked him but still chose to have it from him anyway. Obviously I feel like a mug but don’t want to come off as bitter since it’s new for her but I can’t lie, it hurts. It’s my sister so I love her regardless but I genuinely don’t know how to handle this. Any advice? 8. June 2018

I don’t care about your sister’s dating history, sisters do not go after guys that their siblings like. It’s a rule which doesn’t need to be discussed. Right now you’re just going to do what you can, to try and push to get over it. Distract yourself, keep yourself busy, date other men and ask sis not to talk to you about him, cus she will try to.

I hope you meet someone soon!

Oloni


Hey oloni I have a fwb we’ve been at it for some time I think I may be pregnant haven’t done the test yet but when I do depending on the results should I tell him? Even tho I know what I plan to do already? 8. June 2018

I think it’s important to tell him if you’ve had a scare, and especially if the results are positive. You were both involved so it’s only fair he knows. The only time I’d suggest being discreet about it, is if you felt you could be in danger.

Oloni


Hey Oloni, mine and my boyfriend’s friendship groups are the same (he introduced me) and I’m close with the girls and he got closer with them sort of becoming a girl best friend. The deal is THEY invited ME on holiday, but as I’m already going away with my parents I couldn’t take the time off but the issue of my man and his girl BFF going away together just seems odd to me or I’m overreacting? 8. June 2018

I understand why it makes you uncomfortable, have a conversation with him and express how you feel. Would he be okay if you were going on a trip with a bunch of male friends only??

Open your mouth and talk before his flight gate closes.

Oloni


There’s this guy who I know wants to fuck. We’ve messed around before, but never had actual sex. He seems safe enough, but he is a fuck boy through and through, and I kind of like him already. I dont want to put myself in a place to get hurt, but im really attracted to him and right now there is no one else to fuck, and its been months. Do i go for it and jump out of bed immediately after to avoid feeling anything, or just avoid it all together? Please remember, its been MONTHSS and i really want to. 8. June 2018

I can’t make that decision for you baby girl, only you can. If you KNOW he’s a fuck boy, why would you want to sleep with him?

I get that there are men you don’t take seriously and just have sex with, but why this one? It being months isn’t worth bussin it open for the wrong type of person lol.

Just be careful and weigh out your options carefully.

Oloni


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