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Ask me sex and relationship questions here anonymouslyPlease make questions as *brief* as possible to make sure you get a response. Please be aware that some dilemmas may be posted on social media platforms and cannot be removed on there or Ask Oloni once submitted. Not all questions sent can be answered due to the high amount received daily. For a QUICK response book a private call here

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Hi Oloni, I’m seeing a guy that is older than me (8 years to be precise, I’m 22) he’s nice and all but I find him patronising sometimes. Like he’ll tell me to grow up when we argue and that really irratates me because I personally think for my age I’m quite mature. I’ve addressed that issue but it’s on going. Also he wants a relationship but when I told him I don’t want one just yet. We clearly want different things (he’s looking to settle I’m just not there yet especially as I’m still getting over an ex, he was my first love) I told him I’m not ready but he felt a type of way. What should I do? 29. December 2015

You clearly both want different things. If I were you, I’d let this relationship go!


6 Tips To Help You Get Through Your Winter Break Up 29. December 2015

Hi Oloni, I have been with my boyfriend and a while now and about 3 months ago we found out that I was pregnant. Although shocked at the time due it being unplanned we were both excited. I wasn’t prepared for how much my body was going to change and since I’ve started to show I’ve started to feel insecure and less attractive to him, I’m usually very fit and active but the first trimester was really hard on me and I struggled to keep up my regular gym routine. Now I’m 4 months pregnant my energy levels are back to normal, but now sex is non existent, it’s been like this since my baby bump started to appear. Every time we get physical he stops or makes a comment about the baby or just kisses or cuddles me. Not only has this added to me feeling secure about how attractive I am now but it’s also got me questioning whether he feels the same anymore. I don’t know what to do as he’s insisted he loves me and he is still affectionate, but sleeping in the same bed with no sex for this long is odd to us. Please help me! 28. December 2015

I once worked at Mother and Baby Magazine so I read about situations like this a lot. What you’re going through is absolutely normal for soon to be mothers. Try to spark things back in the bedroom by buying new lingerie, it helps set a the mood for sex. There are plenty of maternity brands out there that create sexy lingerie so have a google and treat yourself. Another thing I’d advise is to communicate outside of the bedroom and let him know exactly how you feel. Talk about how you’re doing emotionally and physically even if he is a very loving partner, it’s important for him to know how his girlfriend and mother of his child is feeling. You should also ask how he is..It’s not unheard of for men to get worried about hurting the baby when having sex, they too also have a lower libido around this period, but remember being intimate isn’t just about sweaty sex you can try different things, such as oral pleasure, masturbating, massages and so much more. That’s the beauty of sex, there are various activities you can try out. I hope this helps.


Hi Oloni. My boyfriend really likes to eat my ass and other things but I draw the line at anal sex. Tbh I don’t even like doing anything related to that area. It doesn’t turn me on at all, I just pretend because he seems to love it a lot. Should I tell him I don’t like it at all or let him have his fun? 28. December 2015

You need to speak up about this before you have sex again. If you’re not comfortable doing something sexually then it needs to become the topic of conversation asap.


Hi oloni, i broke up with my ex of 5 years a few months ago and i met someone new a few weeks later. This person had approached me, i was hesitant to give him a chance but I thought it would help me move on from my ex. As time has gone by i still haven’t gotten over my ex, im still very much in love with him but at the same time i have grown feelings for this other guy. Ive recently told the new guy the truth about my feelings and he didnt take it so well. He got angry and has stopped talking to me but now i feel really sad and i dont know if ive made the right decision. What shall I do? 28. December 2015

You’re not supposed to date a guy with the intentions that’ll hep you move on from a breakup unless were looking for a rebound. I wouldn’t say you were wrong, you were honest. Sometimes honesty doesn’t always receive the best reactions. Perhaps you still might need some more time to enjoy being single, you were in a relationship for 5 years, cool off a bit more till you know you’re definitely ready to jump back into the dating game.


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