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Ask me sex and relationship questions here anonymouslyPlease make questions as *brief* as possible to make sure you get a response. Please be aware that some dilemmas may be posted on social media platforms and cannot be removed on there or Ask Oloni once submitted. Not all questions sent can be answered due to the high amount received daily. For a QUICK response book a private call here

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I’ve been an extremely rocky relationship which involved a lot of cheating on my boyfriend’s part. I tried leaving him several times but could never see it through. After a whole year of being cheated on I also cheated on him with my ex who was in jail. I did it out of spite and anger but did not enjoy it at all. He found out and now says he wants space to ‘do his thing’ after which we can get back together. Since this happened he’s still seen me and told me he loves me but then suddenly wants it to be over. I don’t know what to do or how to turn this around. Please help! 2. February 2016

Hey,

As painful as it may be, you leave. There is nothing about that relationship that you should give you reason to want to go back. Take this as your way out. He has zero respect for you, but one thing he does know is what he is NOT willing to accept (as cheeky as that is considering what he put you through) you should take a leaf out of that book and learn to NEVER compromise your happiness and accept things that hurt you, because this is how it usually goes. Most times the same person who hurts you can and will walk away if you even think of trying to get them back in the same way. So leave this one. Block and move forward. Surround yourself with good friends. Work on your healing and always feel free to write in again if you need help with getting over him. But first step go cold turkey girl and focus on you.

 

-Ebi


Hey oloni. So this guy I’ve been seeing for awhile I’ve caught a few times blabbering on about his ex and even texting her. Iger asked him multiple times if he had any feelings for her and he said no. So tonight I ask him if he has any special girl on his heart. And he told me that the same ex I was referring to he will always have feelings for and she will always have a special place in his heart for. What do I do now? Ove read certain scenarios online and it seems like I’m setting myself up for failure. Help?? 2. February 2016

Hey,

I think you should let this one go. You can always care for someone, but he’s not  going about in the right way and even if he’s not purposely trying to hurt you, sometimes when you haven’t fully healed from something you can end up hurting others. Now you’ve identified this behaviour, it is for you to leave the situation for your own protection. There’s no point forcing anything, protect yourself at all costs, take the signs for what they are and don’t settle for being second best, because right now that’s what you are to him and until he says otherwise that’s what you will continue to be.

 

-Ebi


I’ve had this male friend for around 7 years. He’s always said he likes me and would drop any girl for me but, the physical attraction on my part isn’t there. But I know he’d treat me better than all these boys I catch feelings for. Should I overlook the physical attraction and just date him for him? Or not force it? 2. February 2016

Hey,

You can’t force anything but what you can do is see where things go. Sometimes physical attraction can come afterwards.  No harm in seeing where it goes since you do think he would make a good partner and then seeing whether or not you begin to find him attractive. This sort of thing happens when you’re trying to transition from a really dope friendship to a relationship, so just go with the flow and see where it goes and just know when to nip it in the bud.

-Ebi


VALENTINE’S SALE FOR RELATIONSHIP COACHING – ENDS SOON 1. February 2016

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READ: The ‘Who’s Your Hip Hop Celebrity Valentine?’ Quiz 31. January 2016

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