Ask me sex and relationship questions here anonymously. Please make questions as *brief* as possible to make sure you get a response. Please be aware that some dilemmas may be posted on social media platforms and cannot be removed on there or Ask Oloni once submitted. Not all questions sent can be answered due to the high amount received daily. For a QUICK response book aprivate callhere
Hi oloni, I have been in a relationship with this guy for almost a year now, everything was going well. We had a couple arguments but I guess every relationship does.. Anyway recently we have been arguing over the fact he doesn’t trust me because I have single friends that go out and have fun… He’s asked me to make the decision over him or my friends, what should I do? I definitely don’t want to lose my girls but this guy also means a lot to me.. Please help me
21. June 2016
Hey dear, your boyfriend sounds like he’s insecure and coocoo. Hes being controlling and shouldn’t ever put you such a position. Does he expect you to make friends with people who are strictly in relationships? He’s being unfair and you need to draw the line here and talk about it with him. Being in a relationship doesn’t mean you stop living your life with your friends especially if it’s not disrespecting your relationship. You’ve only been together for nearly a year and the red flags are popping. Don’t ignore them!
What’s the point of asking a question when you’re never gonna answer them . Do you pick and choose what you reply to. It’s really frustrating because I’ve asked you over 10 questions and you never reply
21. June 2016
I answer questions when I get a chance to and have thousands literally sent in. I’m not paid to answer dilemmas on my site I do it out of choice, if your question is that serious, you’d know the alternative way to contact me, which is by booking a call here https://simplyoloni.com/product/private-scheduled-call-session/
Enjoy your day
Oloni
Hey, guys basically I met a guy yesterday and well I gave him oral sex which I didn’t mind but I wasn’t and didn’t want to actually have sex which I told him already but he couldn’t control his self so he put it in with so much force not even slowly (note I have only had sex with one guy and that is like 6 months ago so I’m very tight). Which really hurt I kept saying no stop I don’t feel like it&trying to push him while crying but he didn’t stop he just carry on till after 1 or 2 mins till I actually push him off I have been crying because I feel dirty&slutty about it now I don’t think I can trust guys after that I dunno what to do I told my closest friend but I still feel dirty and also don’t know if this is rape or not plus I was bleeding after that too and feel so much pain.
21. June 2016
Hey hun, I’m so sad and sorry to hear what happened. From the moment you said no to any other sexual act and he continued it became rape. It’s good you’ve spoken to a close friend of yours, but I would advise you go the police as quick as possible. You shouldn’t feel dirty or slutty dear, you didn’t do anything. He took advantage of the situation and should be punished for it. I really do hope you take my advice and if you’d like to talk about it more feel free to email me simplyoloni@gmail.com
Oloni
Hi Oloni. As my 25th birthday slowly approaches, I’m realising that I’ve never really had a serious relationship, I’ve only dated people casually and I really want a life partner now. I’m reached that point in my life where I have so much love to give, but I just can’t find anyone. I’m slowly realising that I need to put effort into finding a partner but I’m not sure how. My confidence isn’t all the way there, and I’m super aware of myself when dating… Sorry if it seems I’m waffling and don’t necessarily have a question, but ultimately I want to know where/how/what I can do to find someone? Many thanks, Single and Tired
21. June 2016
Hey love to me it sounds like you’ve just been working on yourself and dating to find out what you’re looking for in someone serious. Book a coaching call with me here. I’d be happy to help share tips to lead you in the right direction.
Oloni
Hi Oloni, love your blog & what you’re about. I’m a sexual person that hasn’t ever been able to have sex because of the pain. I’ve never really wanted it till I started seeing my current boyfriend, huge guy a corresponding huge third leg lol. I love him, he treats me like a queen and we still get sexual so I’ve had several orgasms with him but I want the real thing. What do I do? We’ve tried using lube but it feels so painful, there’s alot of pressure too, even when he only puts in his fingers. Advice?
21. June 2016
Thank you dear. Okay right from what you’ve described it sounds like you could have Vaginismus. This is a consistent involuntary tightening of the muscles around the vagina whenever penetration is involved. I’m not 100% sure but I would suggest you check it out and also see a sexual health nurse or book an appointment with your GP. I hope you get all the help you need!
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