Ask Oloni

Ask me sex and relationship questions here anonymously. Please make questions as *brief* as possible to make sure you get a response. Please be aware that some dilemmas may be posted on social media platforms and cannot be removed on there or Ask Oloni once submitted. Not all questions sent can be answered due to the high amount received daily. For a QUICK response book a private call here

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Oloni I bought your bullet how can i bring it to a family holiday without them seeing e.g customs/ 19. July 2016

Thank you so much for buying it! I know you’ll enjoy it. My advice to this is to pack in your suitcase and you’ll be fine.

Oloni

Hi oloni, I’ve been with this guy for a little over a year and there is still no official title. We are serious and exclusive to each other but whenever I mention the title he says he’s not ready or is uncomfortable with titles. Advice from most of my friends is that they would have left by now so I need a fresh view. I don’t plan on leaving because I do love him, I just need some advice on how to approach the conversation so he understands my viewpoint? 13. July 2016

Hey darling, if you don’t plan on leaving then my opinion does not matter. You have already made up your mind, like him. He’s not into titles as he said so you might as well stop asking , it’s been a year. Nothing is changing

Oloni

Hi I was seeing this guy for about 3 months, it was really intense and we was just about to officially become a couple. Then the girl he was seeing before me got back in touch. He’s now decided to give things a try with this girl despite still telling me that he still has feelings for me. I’m really having a hard time letting go. It’s making me ill, iv barely slept & haven’t slept for a week straight. He came to talk to me a few days after he made the choice & we ended up having sex 3 times & now I feel stupid. How do I move on from this? 13. July 2016

Hey darling, I’m so sorry to hear about what you’re currently going through it’s clear you had very strong feelings for this guy. My advice is to treat this as a break up, allow yourself to heal from this and try not to contact each other again. You’re allowed to cry but you’re also allowed to learn from this and find things to keep yourself busy to help you move on. I know you explained it was intense but it was only 3 months, be thankful it wasn’t longer! Time really does heal in these cases and I’m sure you’ll be fine.

Oloni

Hey Oloni! I was wondering how I can make fingering pleasurable for myself. I like it when others finger me, yet when I finger myself I feel no type of pleasure. I’ve tried imagining that my fingers were someone else’s and I have tried pairing it with clitoral stimulation. Neither of those seem to do the trick. Could it just be a me thing? Thanks for responding! 11. July 2016

Hey love if fingering isn’t doing much for you check this out!

Also, I wrote a blog recently about masturbation that might help. Check that here

Hi oloni, I’ve recently split up from my girlfriend of two years, and I miss her like crazy, I’m a man’s man, I don’t usually get hung up on a girl, I’m usually like “plenty more Fish” this girl is all I think about, I just need a quick fix on how to stop thinking about her, every time i watch game or thrones, suits, orange is the new black, it makes me think of her and there not shows I wanna boycott because of her, please help me, any advice will be appreciated 11. July 2016

Hey,

My only answer is to go through the motions. Some day’s you will go longer without thinking about her, some days you’ll think about her like crazy, it’s the process of letting go, embrace it. Moving on isn’t about suppressing every single emotion/memory related to that person, it’s coming to peace with it all and coming to peace with it isn’t a space void of emotion. You will still feel and you will still express that feeling but you won’t be where you once were if you channel your “healing” in the right way. Practically, keep yourself busy, surround yourself with dope friends who KNOW how best to distract you [none of this lazy get with loads of girls approach without addressing the real issue rubbish], a lot of guys tend to drown themselves in games or go to the gym (this is a popular one amongst guys, working on your physique has a strange way of making you feel better about yourself). The other major one is working on your passions/talents, put it all into that. As a rule of thumb being the same person or a lesser version of yourself a year after a break up is the easiest way to feel as though you’ve lost a part of you in that break up, becoming a better version of yourself, that version of self you were unable to be within that relationship is the best way to feel as though you gained more than you lost.

Hope this helped.

Ebi

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