@aggyabby
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Sorry, I fell asleep
Hi, basically i was seeing someone for a few months and i can honestly say that i had deep feelings for her, but recently we had a fight and shit happened so we ended up calling it a day, i still think about her occasionally i cant lie, since the time we stopped talking i have slept with other women but it just doesn’t feel the same, like i don’t enjoy it at all even though the sex isn’t bad, what advice can you give me
24. December 2016
What you do with other people when you’re not in a relationship is your business. If you know you’re actually serious about the woman, call her and tell the lady how you feel.
Oloni
i have an issue with my boyfriends dishonesty about the smallest things such as where he has been and who he is with, he’ll tell me one thing , then i’ll catch him in a lie and he FLIPS out , becomes verbally abusive and tells me that i’m always being negative or looking for problems when i bring up how lying. I try to explain to him that not every time i bring up an issue or the fact that he’s been untruthful – is not me attacking him but just trying to get clarity on why he would need to be dishonest about something so minor. It gets me paranoid because my kind goes crazy wondering why he has lied and then i become upset because it leads to big arguments where he is VERY rude, calls me pathetic, stupid, mad etc and even hangs up the phone on me. He never lets me get a word in anywhere , it’s just him shouting at me like he’s my father and instructing me to listen. I love him a lot but it’s becoming stressful arguing every few days over minor issues and i’m not sure how to get through to someone who simply doesn’t listen. How would you advise i communicate with him or how could we work on our communication together? Because “leave him sis” is not something i want to consider as I know that this is my future partner.
24. December 2016
I have no idea why you bothered to write in when you finished your dilemma, with what you know you should be doing. How can your future be someone who is manipulating you? This is called gaslighting and should be the furthest thing you want from someone in a serious relationship.
He lies, drives you crazy, speaks down on you and doesn’t sound like he truly cares about you. Listen, you deserve WAY more. There is so much better out there, I swear to you. The longer you stay with chains around your ankle in this relationship, the harder it will become to walk away. Why do that to yourself?
Relationships are supposed to be about two people coming together to bring out the best in each other. Not this.
If you want more personal advice on how to handle this and you’re SERIOUS contact me personally HERE
Oloni
Hi Oloni, my bf and I have been on and off for the past three years and although we have managed to work through our issues, both of our families are very much guarded when we talk about our future. He recently gave me and ultimatum, which was to get married or walk away from the relationship and I agreed that we should get married. No one in my family is happy for me, especially my mother and sister, and I can already sense them distancing themselves away. I don’t want to have a bad relationship with my family nor do I want to lose the man I love. What should I do?
24. December 2016
Hey hun, it makes sense as to why both your families may be guarded and perhaps not the biggest fans of your relationship. But what stuck out to me when you wrote in, was the ultimatum your boyfriend gave you. Why was it ‘get married or walk?’ who does that? There’s clearly a bit more to this story, but I find that very weird in itself. You shouldn’t get married to someone out of fear that they will walk away if you don’t walk down the aisle with them tomorrow at 11am…especially if you might not be ready.
As for your family? Try sitting them down and having a conversation, talk about your differences and what you sense is happening with the relationship you have with them all, especially your mum.
Hopefully this all helps.
Oloni
Hi oloni, this boy I used to see keeps liking my best friends pictures and it’s really getting to me.. me & this boy went through some shit and I don’t know if he’s doing it because he wants her or just to get to me as I have mentioned it to him before. I ended up having to delete him because it was just torturing me but I’m actually mad at my friend, although she’s not encouraging it I feel like she should delete him too.. am I right to say something to her or no? I know it’s stupid but it’s just how I feel
24. December 2016
It’s not that serious, let him keep liking till his fingers get sore. From the sounds of things, it doesn’t seem like what you had was deep enough to be confronted.
Oloni
To get straight into it, my man refuses to go down on me, regardless of the fact I had never gave head before him and expressed it’s not something I wanted to do and YET now give him head for his pleasure because I care about pleasing him. It insults me that he can’t care about my needs to do the same as generally I get a lot more pleasure out of oral sex. It’s not a case where I’ve asked him and he has said no, but he has made jokes about how I won’t “ever be getting my pussy ate ever again” because I’m his now, obviously indicating he wouldn’t ever do it. I’m a shy person so I don’t feel comfortable just blurting out can you eat me out. But I am serious about him and I can’t lie it is an issue to me, especially as in all previous relationship I have received oral I am not used to it and he is making me feel undesirable and as though he doesn’t think I’m a beautiful creation which he bloody well should. I’ve no idea what I expect you to say but you seem to have a magical response to everything. Thanks
24. December 2016
Hey hun! Ahhh it’s so annoying when a guy doesn’t know what your body enjoys between the sheets. That comment he made though, ‘you won’t ever be getting your pussy ate again’ – So he’s basically aware that other men were giving you the full work while he’s doing the bare minimum lol?
Right, the answer to this is communication. I understand you’re shy, but shyness doesn’t mean your needs get to be ignored. Although you can’t force him to do what he may not feel comfortable with, someone you’re sleeping with regularly should know what your vagina enjoys most. You need to have more conversations about sex, so he knows it’s important to you too.
Good luck
Oloni
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