Ask me sex and relationship questions here anonymously. Please make questions as *brief* as possible to make sure you get a response. Please be aware that some dilemmas may be posted on social media platforms and cannot be removed on there or Ask Oloni once submitted. Not all questions sent can be answered due to the high amount received daily. For a QUICK response book aprivate callhere
Hey Oloni. Silly question cause I probably know what the right thing to do in this situation is however I’ve recently started talking to a guy I’ve known for a few years. We get along really great as friends, he’s literally become my best friend and I’m able to talk to him literally about anything. We’ve been out on several dates & sometimes just quick outings as friends but I feel like sometimes it’s more than just a friendship. I did eventually bring this up to him as I am interested in a relationship however it’s not the be all or end all for me but he’s told me he’s not ready for one. This obvs hurt my feelings a bit so I tried to distance myself from him just to keep our friendship & not start to behave bitter about not being his gf but he puts in 10000% with me even down to the littlest things which I’ve noticed he doesn’t do with other people. Part of me is telling me to leave the situation alone as he’s voiced what it is but the other part of me feels/sees something different to what he’s telling me. I think we have an amazing friendship which I don’t wanna ruin however I really wanna see where this can take us over time. Sorry I know it’s really long basically I just need advice on whether I’m making a complete fool of myself, which I probs am lol. Thanks!x
7. January 2018
Hey hun, I know it’s hard because his actions aren’t matching up with his words, but from what you’ve described it sounds like he doesn’t want the full responsibility of having a girlfriend. So it’s not that he doesn’t like you, he just doesn’t see himself in a relationship with you, which isn’t good enough.
You have two choices, you can either settle and hang on to this half hearted love, or you try to distance yourself even more before your feelings grow even stronger.
Oloni
Hi Oloni, I met a guy at work he’s so cool. He invited me around his house for a meal.. turns out when I got there, there wasn’t a hot meal waiting for me lol he used that to lure me to his house. We ended up being intimate and the session was great! Now I find that every other day he asks me ‘you wanna come round tonight?’ It’s never lets go out.. I’m not trying to be just a fuck buddy, what should I do?
7. January 2018
Never go to a guys house on the first date love. Also, express this to him, but I think he’s only interested in sex.
Oloni
Hey! So I met this guy a few months ago and he’s literally my dream man, we have so much in common and he doesn’t even know because all we do is fuck. There’s not really any other interaction, he’s clearly not looking for a relationship and that’s fine but I’m just gutted because I could be his dream girl too and some time this whole ‘fucking’ thing is going to end and I’m gonna lose my dream man all because he ain’t wanna talk lol I need to express something like this to him, do you have any tips?
7. January 2018
Heya hun, sounds like you’re super sprung on this lad and you’re probably using sex to stay close to him. If you know he’s not after a relationship, end it before it becomes a situationship.
Oloni
So, there’s this guy who I became friends with last year and he’s basically the sweetest person ever. He constantly doing little things that matter not just for me but for my friends too. The thing is he has never so much as mentioned that he wanted a relationship with me or anything but then I recently realized that I have feelings for him. Now I am considering talking to him and asking him if we have a future together, but then I’ve been over thinking what if he doesn’t have feelings for me and I make things awkward? Anyway what do you suggest I do? Talk to him or remain quiet?
5. January 2018
How about asking him out on a date first?
Oloni
So I’ve I started dating this guy and he doesn’t know I’ve done porn before. I’ve left that industry but it still haunts me. I really really like him but every time I’ve entered into a relationship with someone they’ve found out my old videos and told the guy. I feel like I may have found the one, what do I do?
5. January 2018
Hey hun! Thanks for writing in, I can see why you’re worried, especially since we still live in a society that still slutshames women heavily.
The best thing you can do is tell him, because if it’s already out there, there’s a huge chance he too will come across it. I don’t think you should allow it to haunt you either, you did porn because you felt comfortable doing it and hopefully empowered too.
I have friends in the porn industry who are in happy relationships, so I don’t want you feel like you’re not capable of finding someone who will accept you, for who you are.
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