Ask me sex and relationship questions here anonymously. Please make questions as *brief* as possible to make sure you get a response. Please be aware that some dilemmas may be posted on social media platforms and cannot be removed on there or Ask Oloni once submitted. Not all questions sent can be answered due to the high amount received daily. For a QUICK response book aprivate callhere
Grab your girls (or come solo!) and join us for the ultimate Empowerment Brunch, hosted by the queen of vibes herself—Oloni!
This brand-new event is all about building connections and celebrating sisterhood. Expect an afternoon like no other—fun, laughter, and deep connections await! Whether you’re bringing your besties or coming to make new friends, this is the place to be.
TW *DV* Hi oloni, so I’ve been with my partner for almost 3 years it was good up until last year that’s when things started to get bad, I would find texts from girls, girls earrings in his room and all sorts but every time I mentioned it to him he would go crazy and stat hitting me, it’s got worst the last couple of months to the point where I’m getting black eyes, my lips buss out, bruises all over my body, leaving marks all over my face. Every time I try to leave I end up back with him. He puts me down I have 0 confidence in myself and I will do everything for this man but he still treats me like this. It’s even hard to leave as we have a daughter together! I don’t even know what to do anymore, he makes me feel so worthless we don’t even have a sex life, I know his cheating on me but I’m scared to say anything in case he beats me again.
30. January 2018
This is so devastating to read and I’m sorry you’re having to go through this. You need to understand that this relationship is incredibly unhealthy and I know it’s easier said than done, but you have to leave. That is your only option, it’s the only option I want for you. Think of your child and the environment they have to grow up in. The longer you stay, the more difficult it’ll become before you’re able to walk. Try seeking help from a friend or family member. Someone you know who’d be willing to help. It’s also important that you report him to the police, especially if you’re fearful that he could try to find you.
Hey Oloni… Me and my boyfriend have been together for almost 8 months but we’ve been friends for almost 4 years prior to us dating… I wasn’t in his group of friends but I was really close to him and a friend and all and there were always feelings between us. Anyway since we started dating two of the female friends in his group of friends do provocative stuff and make me feel uncomfortable and when my boyfriend sets obvious boundaries they’re offended and claim they’re more important than me because they were his friends first (they’ve been hanging out for two years so that statement alone is a reach)… I just don’t really know how to deal with it I wouldn’t want my boyfriend to be in bad blood with his friends because of me but I also want my relationship and the boundaries my boyfriend and I set respected
30. January 2018
Well it sounds like your boyfriend has already done plan A. Which is talking to them, but now it might be time for plan B, distancing himself. His friends don’t respect you as his girlfriend, so it’s only right he backs away from them. True friends wouldn’t behave like that. Talk to him further and tell him how you feel.
Oloni
Hi oloni. Me and my boyfriend have been together for 3 years we’ve have our ups and downs with his faithfulness. In previous months when I’d go to work I’d go back home and see on my history omegle chats and sex chats, and he’d always deny it was him, when it blatantly was. Same thing happened recently and it’s something I cba to even bring up because I know he will deny it but I’m also thinking is this a massive red flag because it’s not exactly innocent if he would hide it, and we’re moving in together soon so I don’t want to go through any more disloyalty
27. January 2018
You shouldn’t be moving in together, there’s clearly some issues you both need to sort out.
Oloni
Hi Oloni, fingers crossed you reply to this one! About 4 months into the friendship with my best friend at uni I told him I had feelings for him. He wasn’t over his ex at the time and said I meant the world to him but as we were going to be housemates the next year he said we couldn’t be anything. Our sexual chemistry is insane however so we ended up sleeping together a week later. 2 years on and we’ve been sleeping together the whole time. It’s been rocky as hell at times and he still says he wants nothing with me, but as he is my best friend and we haven’t succeeded in stopping sleeping together (boy have we tried) it’s just impossible for me to not have feelings for him. His family and all of his and our friends (even strangers) are all shocked we aren’t together. But regardless – what do I do? How do I get out of this headspace? I don’t want to lose him from my life and we are so codependent he wouldn’t let me if I tried, but him trying to meet other girls is eating away at me. Much appreciated!
27. January 2018
Heya, you’ve both gone somewhere you shouldn’t have, especially after you admitted you wanted to be with him romantically. This is the reason your feelings are growing stronger.
I would suggest taking a break from this friendship because it will become even harder for you, if you continue it. He’s already said he doesn’t want to be with you, regardless of how many times you have sex, so you’re only creating more problems for yourself.
Spend time away with friends, making new friends, finding a new love interest.
Oloni
Hi oloni, hope you’re well. My boyfriend is an amazing man, he had to pick up a lot of responsibilities when his father passed as he is the eldest of 6 siblings who are still really young. He once told me he had dreams of doing music but I never heard him say it again. I was snooping through his phone and his notes app has loads of lyrics for songs written on it and they looked really impressive. He writes a new track maybe once a week and he’s an awesome lyricist. He doesn’t know I snoop and I feel like I invaded his privacy but I really want to help motivate and push him towards this. What do I do?
18. January 2018
Oh darling, you must learn not to invade peoples privacy, it’s not right.
Moving on, tell him what you saw and explain how much you believe in him. Hopefully he’ll look past you snooping.
Subscribe To Our Newsletter
Sign up to our mailing list to read our sex and relationship features first.
You have Successfully Subscribed!