Ask me sex and relationship questions here anonymously. Please make questions as *brief* as possible to make sure you get a response. Please be aware that some dilemmas may be posted on social media platforms and cannot be removed on there or Ask Oloni once submitted. Not all questions sent can be answered due to the high amount received daily. For a QUICK response book aprivate callhere
Hey girl, just recently got into your blogs and I love it! Congrats on your blue tick!! I’m 18 and I’ve been seeing a guy who’s 20. Ok here goes before we started talking he was VERY sexual active. I’m talking threesomes ect. So me being a Virgin its made me quite nervous “will I be good enough, can I satisfy him enough” we’ve been seeing eachother for nearly a year no sexual activity, he has not pressured me however he does ask here & there. Recently I had a feeling he’s been having sex with other girls (I’m not too fussed) just tell me. I asked him he said he has no since we started talking. But I knew he was lying, one night we were together and I asked him I begged him to tell me the truth, he confessed. He has been sexual active with other females. I was a little upset but he explained that it was just sex nothing more and be apologised for not telling me. I mean I’m ready to have sex but I’m going to wait it out a little just to see how thing go between us and if he’s the person I actually want to lose it to. But I just really want him to get tested but I’m not to sure how to go about it, without being rude? Please help!
28. September 2016
Hey hun, if you’re ‘seeing’ a guy, you must learn not to be too pressed about his sexual activity unless you’ve both spoken and decided to be exclusive. It’s normal to wonder and think about what he’s doing, but you mustn’t let it consume you. If you think he’ll be the one you lose your virginity to, then tell him you’ve been having thoughts, however you’d feel comfortable if he got a check up.
Hi Oloni congrats on everything! So basically i’m a female and i love sex but I have no interest in being in a relationship at present. I find that having one regular partner leads to feelings & complications but i also fear having sex (although safe) with different men will ruin my chances of settling down when i’m ready as it’s not in my nature to lie to potential partners. I also don’t feel like having sex with old partners just for the sake of preserving my bodycount. I’m not sure what the right thing to do is?
28. September 2016
The tip I’d give here is to only have sex with your friend with benefits, a lot of people go on dates with the dude they’re sleeping with or hang out with them, then wonder how they got so attached.
It’s all about understanding the type of person you are too, so if you feel like sleeping with someone continuously is going to set off emotions you didn’t know you had, you might just want to lean away from this option in general and perhaps stick to masturbation.
Oloni
Oloni, ive been going on dates with this guy who claims single but still lives with his babymum who has just had a second child for him who isnt even up to 3 months old. Ive wanted him for years now but i feel bad, i mean if he says hes not with her who am i to say he is, we also recently sex, am i the mistress or is he genuinely trying to be with me?
28. September 2016
If you don’t mind sharing him, then carry on doing whatever it is your doing. A single man is very unlikely to live with the mother of his child after not one but TWO kids I think you know the answer to this question.
Oloni
Hey girl, so about 3 years ago I was seeing this guy, everything was great he was soooo mature and such a gentleman. He always made me feel beautiful even though at the time I thought I wasn’t because I had problems with my weight. So we were seeing each other for a few months and I gained proper feelings for him, one day I was scrolling through Instagram and a girl posted a picture of him and her together and quoted it “power couple” ? When I confronted him he ignored me. So now 3 years on he’s back, he says he wants something serious with me, he seems really genuine but I don’t know if I can trust him. Do you think I should give him a chance or am I being stupid?
28. September 2016
You’re being stupid. He had a girlfriend then ignored you, now he’s back? What for?
Oloni
I was in a relationship for 7 years and it ended in December due to many reasons including long distance etc. I fell into a pattern of meaningless sex with guys I actually liked and now 10 months after the breakup I met a great guy with all a girl could ask for (job, his own house, caring, complete gentleman etc). We only met 2 weeks ago but he’s already telling me he knows what he wants and its me..he wants a future with me and wants to skip the boyfriend/girlfriend thing and be full on intense. Ok my issue is I have found basically what most girls want but I don’t know how to tell him it’s all a bit fast or am I just scared to commit? He’s amazing but I don’t find myself yearning for him like I have other guys in the past and Oh..he wants to wait till marriage to have sex (which is a completely new concept to me). I hope this makes sense..I’m just in a funk at the moment. Thanks
28. September 2016
Hey girl! It sounds like he hasn’t given you a chance to take in this new relationship, that’s why the boyfriend and girlfriend stage is necessary to many. It’s great he knows he wants to be with you, but in order for you to jump the broom with him, you have to feel the same, or it’ll be a very one sided relationship. Have a chat with him and just express how you feel. Marriage is a serious and big commitment, so it’s best if you both take some time.
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