Ask Oloni

Ask me sex and relationship questions here anonymously. Please make questions as *brief* as possible to make sure you get a response. Please be aware that some dilemmas may be posted on social media platforms and cannot be removed on there or Ask Oloni once submitted. Not all questions sent can be answered due to the high amount received daily. For a QUICK response book a private call here

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Hey Oloni, my friend and I have recently decided to start dating. In my eyes he’s doing everything right however, we’ve been on two dates and he hasn’t made a move to try and kiss me, we went to the cinema we sat on the back row and he didn’t even try anything, but by the way he’s acting I can tell that he’s interested. Am I expecting too much too soon? 20. July 2018

He’s probably shy or not sure if he can make a move. Why not make a signal yourself? Invite him in for a kiss by the use of body language and pull a Megan from Love Island.

Oloni

When my boyfriend and I met; he was 100% aware that I was no prepared to have sexual intercourse until I was married. He knew this prior to us entering a relationship. It’s been 8 months and recently he has been making advances that are really inappropriate. What makes are relationship work despite the sexual tension is not escalating things that would lead to us having intercourse and recently it seems like he is ignoring these boundaries. I don’t want to come across as a prude cause I know that he isn’t a virgin but I don’t want things to continue as they are, as I see things escalating sexually in way that I wouldn’t want to until I’m married. My faith is really important to me. 20. July 2018

Hey my love! It’s actually annoying when you tell men one thing and they don’t listen. First, I think it’s amazing you’ve chosen to be celibate. It shows strength that I hope you’re empowered by.

When it comes to your bf, you either need to let him go or revisit the topic and have a very deep conversation about it, so he understands what lines not to cross when it comes to romantic intimacy.

I don’t know if you’re open to kissing, but against other forms of touching. Whatever it is you need to clarify it, so he understands and respects it. If you notice the same pattern, then it’s clear you’re not on the same page at all.

You need to be with someone who has the same values as you sexually and will not try to tempt you or even make you question your celibacy.

I really do hope it works out!

Oloni

Hi oloni. I have a sugar daddy and we are exclusive so I don’t sleep with anyone else and neither does he but I started fucking my ex behind his back. He found out and gave me a second chance and Iv been faithful since however he’s so overprotective. He wants all my social media passwords, wants to check my phone, he pays my rent and recently asked for a key. He takes care of me so well financially but I feel like he’s to insecure. 20. July 2018

He has no right to be asking for passwords etc. that’s way too much. The key to an apartment he pays for I hear, but either way he sounds quite controlling.

The truth is if you don’t want to deal with any of this any more, you have to cut him off and find another way to get your bills paid.

When a sugar daddy sponsors a large majority of your livelihood, some can definitely become overbearing. Cut him off or talk to him and let him no if he doesn’t back off, you’ll leave.

Oloni

Hey so I’ve started seeing this guy and we turned out relationship into something sexual , I haven’t been with a guy for a year . So we had sex twice and we started talking all day, everyday. My feelings for him were developing a lot. One day I’m the middle of a conversation he asked me if I’ve going to be checked for any STI’s , I said no , bearing in mind we are both clean. He called me and told me he had Chlamydia and that I should get checked out. I just hung up and started to cry as I was going to admit the feelings I had caught for him . I don’t know what to do or say. I can’t eat or sleep. During our talking stage he had told me he had not been with anyone else . What do I do ? I still care for him deeply despite he was ruined my life 20. July 2018

Hey love, it sucks that he lied about being intimate with other people as he put your sexual health at risk. It wouldn’t have cost him anything to be honest.

In the future just be sexually wise by ALWAYS using condoms. Buy some and always carry them with you just in case.

Most importantly you need to see a sexual health nurse asap to get tested. Once you tell them you’ve been sexually active with someone who has chlamydia, they’ll give you the antibiotics, but it’s usually advised to return in another couple of weeks to get tested again.

You’ll be fine.

Oloni

Hi Oloni, I’ve been going on dates with this white guy, and he’s only seen me with my natural hair (type 4).. I’m thinking of getting a wig but I dunno how i will explain closures and frontals without freaking him out!.. i know it’s not about sex but I would appreciate your advice. Thanks 18. July 2018

Hun get your hair. Why are you worried about explaining your hair to a caucasian man? He’s white, not an alien. If it comes up you simply say it’s a wig/weave/hair extensions etc. It’s not that serious lol.

Oloni

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