Ask me sex and relationship questions here anonymously. Please make questions as *brief* as possible to make sure you get a response. Please be aware that some dilemmas may be posted on social media platforms and cannot be removed on there or Ask Oloni once submitted. Not all questions sent can be answered due to the high amount received daily. For a QUICK response book aprivate callhere
I have this thing where I only introduce a girlfriend to my parents if I feel like seriously in love. I’ve only ever introduced one girl to them, maybe I’m old fashioned in this. Anyway, I’m with this girl, and I feel like we’re in a very good place at the moment. We’ve been together about 5 months now and talked for prolly 1-2 months before. She’s been wondering why I don’t let her around mine when family are home & I’m unsure how to articulate why I haven’t. How do I tell her that I’m not at that stage yet without hurting her feelings and making her feel like she’s just another girl?
23. June 2015
You’re just going to have to be open and honest. ‘I usually feel more comfortable in introducing a partner to my family when I’m ready’. She may not like the answer, but she’ll respect your honesty.
I was dating a guy for 6 months. Neither of us had the conversation about being exclusive or making it something serious. I knew he was seeing other people and vice versa. Great sex, great dates, I just don’t think either one of us were ready to commit to each other. Recently I’ve posted pictures from my dates with another guy I just started seein. Shortly after I posted those pictures, Mr. Sensitive (guy I was seeing for 6 months) unfollowed me and unfriended me. I called him to ask if he wanted to talk about it. I couldn’t believe he was acting like this, considering he is 40 and I’m in my early 20’s. I feel like he wanted me to know he was upset because, he didn’t block me anywhere. Just unfollowed and unfriended. Am I in the wrong? Or is he really in his feelings.
23. June 2015
It sounds like you did it out of spite so he could see it and he did. So why are you bothered? You’re not seeing each other any more so him following you rather than blocking should not be something you think about deeply.
Hi oloni my dilemma is a bit different to what you normally get. Anyway my dilemma is that I have a very bad relationship with my mother, we are not the best of friends simply because over the years she has hurt me with her words when she is cursing me. For years i have gone out of my way to earn her love, respect and to just be appreciated for what i do. I do everything she asks of me, never complain i also contribute towards house bills when i get paid from work but she still threatens to throw me out the house even after i have paid my dues. She sometimes curses me when i have not done anything i try not to say anything out of respect for her often times i will just keep quite but it really hurts me as i ponder on the names she calls me. I cry myself to sleep everynight and try to pray but nothing seems to change. Today she said i have until the end of month to be out her house, i dont have anywhere to go as im only 20.Help me as i am borderline depressed. 😢 ontop of it i have recently just gone through a hurtful break up.
23. June 2015
You and your mum need to have a serious conversation. Do you have any siblings or close relatives you think you can ask to get involved? Have a family discussion and talk to her, share how you feel and allow her to realise how her words hurt you. Has your mum been going through anything? A lot of the times parents take out their troubles on their kids without noticing the hurt they are causing.
Since I found out who my boyfriends ex was I’ve been feeling a lot more insecure with my body than ever before. I mean she’s a 10 physically and I would say I’m a 7.5 but facially its vice versa. thats not good enough for me. I would really love to feel that he upgraded with me and I’m actually willing to do what it takes (no surgeries though lol) to get my body to a level that i would feel more comfortable and confident with. Am i crazy for thinking this? I haven’t talked to anyone about this cos i feel they’ll think I’m mad, lol. Do you have any advice for me?
22. June 2015
My love, you shouldn’t care if your bf’s ex looks like Taz Mania. Her beauty is not your concern. You’re clearly insecure forgetting WHY he is with you. Why are you talking about upgrading when his happiness stems from you? Do you know what that’s worth? Don’t get me wrong always make sure you look your best for your partner & YOURSELF by eating right, exercising, dressing well etc etc. but don’t let the past play with your future.
Hey Oloni, So I’ve been dating my current boyfriend for close to a year now, and we really are in love but the only problem is that he gets really jealous about ANYTHING and EVERYTHING! To add to that he gets really angry and when we have arguments he hurts me with his words but claims it out of love while apologising. Im not the type that has guy friends as i have cut a lot of them even before we started dating for my own reasons but it doesn’t mean i can’t reply to a few friendly ‘Hey. How are you. It’s been a while’ messages. We argue a lot about things like this and apparently so did him and his ex. I believe relationships are real hard work and because of this belief I’m not even sure if I am getting red lights to leave the relationship or green lights to go on in the hopes that it will all be worth it in the end. Please I could really use some of your advice.
22. June 2015
There is nothing about what you have written the screams ‘green light, this will be worth it in the end’. – He’s insecure and it’s affecting the health of this relationship. Unless you can sort this out and figure out WHY he has these issues the relationship will not progress properly. You shouldn’t have to fear talking to a few old or current friends because of his own problems. Speak to him.
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