Ask me sex and relationship questions here anonymously. Please make questions as *brief* as possible to make sure you get a response. Please be aware that some dilemmas may be posted on social media platforms and cannot be removed on there or Ask Oloni once submitted. Not all questions sent can be answered due to the high amount received daily. For a QUICK response book aprivate callhere
Hi Oloni. I feel as if I’m the one having to pursue sex all the time recently with my boyfriend and I’m not some sex addict but I feel as if he can go without it for days and I cant, especially when we used to have sex everyday/multiple times. Also, he’s no longer giving me head and hasn’t done for weeks now, it’s always just using saliva to make me ‘wet’ so how do I bring this up?
5. April 2017
Hey hun, you have to talk about it. I always say, if you’re able to have sex with someone, then surely you should be able to do the most basic thing and communicate. Ask him what’s going on an why there’s a slight disconnection in the bedroom. It could be a phase, it might not, but the best thin to do is address everything, after all he is your boyfriend.
Oloni
Hi Oloni, I’ve been seeing this guy for 4 months now. I’m in the midlands because of uni and he’s in London, we talk every single day and see each other at least twice a month. We’ve made it very clear that even though it isn’t official, we aren’t seeing anyone else other than each other. In the beginning (before we had sex) he was so keen to take me on dates and drive up to my uni but ever since we’ve had sex he’s stopped offering. Every time I see him we’re chilling in his car…which often leads to sex. He does have a full time job so I understand that he’s very busy. He doesn’t even want to come up to my uni anymore cos the drive is “too long”. How do I voice my concerns without sounding petty ?
5. April 2017
Simply talk to him and say how you feel.
Oloni
Hey Oloni , my boyfriend is 24 and starting to go bald.When we met years ago, he was handsome with a little stubble and a hairline. Now he had very visible patches on his head and they’re very shiny. Needless to say he has fallen off in his looks whilst i’ve glo’d up halleluuu. I only find him attractive with a hat on and it makes me not want to have sex with him because I cannot get thoughts of those patches out of my head. What I’m saying is, I find my boyfriend unattractive, the sexual chem is fading and I don’t know what to do about it? Am I being shallow or petty?
3. April 2017
Hey girl! Oh nooo. Although you’re being honest with yourself, you mean to tell me there’s nothing else about him that attracts you to your bf since he started losing his hair? Hun this is what a lot of men have to go through, just like we have to accept that one day, I’ll boobs won’t be so high.
If you feel like the chemistry isn’t there, don’t waste anyone’s time and do the right thing so someone else can scoop him up. You’ll also get the chance to find exactly what you’re looking for, just remember.. beauty will always fade and there’s nothing you can do about it.. well, unless you’re Kim Ka.. nvm.
Hi Oloni, me and this guy have been talking + seeing each other for a while now! The sexual attraction is evidently there as we had a sex a few times. As of lately, we have been having cyber sex; sending nudes, voice notes! He always cums and it turns me on even more. We live 10 mins away and he never suggests for me to come and finish the job! Now I think this is weird as we could be intimate in person but chooses not to meet up! I have suggested him to come mine once & once it shall be! So should I stop entertaining him as there is no point as I have needs to? 😳
3. April 2017
Hi Oloni! I’ve been I a relationship with this guy for 3 1/2 years. I’ve known him for 7. He’s never been a cheating kind of guy ever since I’ve known him. With that being said we had a very rough start because he cheated but we pushed through it. Everything feels right with exception of his female friends. I have no problem with any of his friends (that I meet). Being the artist he is he spends a lot of time with females I don’t know at the studio. One day one comes to pick him up from our home and asks him to drive. I will admit I stop them from driving off butt naked, I was in the tub when she came at the time, to confront the situation. Needless to say I made a fool of myself because she was just a friend. I feel if he would have introduced us from the beginning or said hey babe come meet my friend I wouldnt have had to do any of that. I guess my question is should I not feel disrespected when im not introduced to his female friends. Or am i just overly anal about this?
3. April 2017
Ohh girlll, please tell me you’re joking about the naked part! Oh gosh!!
Right, so the question you asked is extremely valid, ‘should he introduce me to his friends who are women?’ – The answer is yes.. but he should really introduce you to all friends male or female. Especially when they come to the house, however, you were indecent.. so it makes sense why this was an awkward one.
It sounds like you still have trust issues and you have to work on it if you want to make it work with him. You either push past what happened before or leave this relationship and stop torturing yourself.
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