Ask me sex and relationship questions here anonymously. Please make questions as *brief* as possible to make sure you get a response. Please be aware that some dilemmas may be posted on social media platforms and cannot be removed on there or Ask Oloni once submitted. Not all questions sent can be answered due to the high amount received daily. For a QUICK response book aprivate callhere
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Hi Oloni. I broke up with my boyfriend in November and it was mostly mutual. and we have been having sex and acting like a couple ever since. We do have the occasional what are we converstion and he made it clear he doesnt want a relationship with me ever, but he loves me and doesn’t want to let me go as long as he can. What would you do if this was your dilemma? Would you cut him off because its never going to be anything in the long run, or just be in it to have fun for the time being? He is the first person I’ve ever been inlove with. He knows I want him back and he could get me back at anytime he wants. Should I stop making myself so available to him, if yes how should I do that? Thanks alot Oloni
9. July 2017
If he’s already told you how he feels, my answer shouldn’t mean much. No fun can come out of this, if you’re desperately after something serious with him again. Break things off with him immediately, it’s that simple.
Oloni
I was with my ex for a few years. We split up and got back together a year later. She told me she never slept with anybody, so I said let’s give it a go. 8 months into us trying again, she confesses that when we were apart she became a sex worker. She acts like it never happened, I’ve tried to ignore it but whenever I look at her I don’t see the mother of my children or wife. There’s been many occasions where we could have been intimate but I just can’t. I truly love her but I’m not sure if this is something I can get over.
9. July 2017
It was not wise of her to lie at all. I think you need to sit down and have a mature conversation about your feelings towards her and the relationship.
Oloni
Hi oloni, I think I might have vaginismus but I don’t know how to go about it. I have a very active sex life but penetration is always difficult and sometimes impossible. I never enjoy sex and I’m beginning to think maybe I should just remain celibate for the rest of my life. I’m really frustrated about the whole situation.
9. July 2017
Hey hun, sorry to hear about what you’re going through. Vaginismus is known to be quite painful and gets in the way of having a normal sex life. I’d suggest seeing a sex therapist, they’re helpful and can usually train your vagina through objects so it goes away.
Hey Oloni, I met an awesome guy on Tinder and after phone calls we met up and had the most amazing first date. I stayed over and his house but we did not have any sexual encounter, we actually went to sleep and cuddled and it was really nice. Ever since that first meet, we’ve arranged to meet on 3 other days and he always has an excuse at the very last 30mins before we meet and cannot show up. We have been speaking consistently via text but he never answers my phone calls and just responds with text and no excuse. I’m starting to get annoyed and not sure whether it’s worth investing in further? What would you suggest that I do?
9. July 2017
He has a girlfriend and the night you stayed around, she was out of town.
Oloni
Hey Oloni, I’ve been in a happy and stable relationship for over a year. Recently my partner introduced me to an old friend/colleague of his. We became cool I guess. But she calls at dumb times me to say she misses being around my man all the time. My partner did say they had never gone beyond friendship so he doesn’t know what she’s talking about. But I still feel weird about it… I’m not looking to rein-act Obsessed. What should I do?
9. July 2017
Oh lord! I watched Obsessed, aint nobody trying to live that life. Have a strong word with your man and explain how you feel regarding this old friend. He clearly needs to talk to her to create some boundaries because she’s clearly disrespecting your relationship. Give him a chance to handle it.
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