Ask me sex and relationship questions here anonymously. Please make questions as *brief* as possible to make sure you get a response. Please be aware that some dilemmas may be posted on social media platforms and cannot be removed on there or Ask Oloni once submitted. Not all questions sent can be answered due to the high amount received daily. For a QUICK response book aprivate callhere
Grab your girls (or come solo!) and join us for the ultimate Empowerment Brunch, hosted by the queen of vibes herself—Oloni!
This brand-new event is all about building connections and celebrating sisterhood. Expect an afternoon like no other—fun, laughter, and deep connections await! Whether you’re bringing your besties or coming to make new friends, this is the place to be.
Hi Oloni i am 18 and currently considering getting a sugar daddy, I was wondering if you could inform me of what it entails and also give me a link of where i could possibly find one
3. August 2017
I did a thread on it. Search the word Sugar Daddy on here at the very top.
Oloni
Hi Oloni, I just wanted to say that I adore your platform and I’m an avid follower! Okay, so my dilemma is that I have suffered with severe mental health issues for the best part of my adult (and teenaged) life. As a symptom of my issues I’ve done a lot of self harming over time. I’ve left some really nasty scars on the tops of my thighs and I’m terrified of being intimate with any one for fear of them seeing them and freaking out and running away from me. I feel so insecure about the idea of getting naked infront of someone that I feel like I will never have a relationship. Is there anything I can use to full the scars or?? Helpppp
3. August 2017
Thanks for writing in! The truth is a lot of us have insecurities when lying naked with someone. The best thing to do is to work on your confidence and only have sex with people you’re comfortable with.. it’s the most important thing.
If someone you’re comfortable with does eventually ask questions, it’s then up to you to decide whether you want to open up and share.
If you ever do find yourself self harming please try to get help, and if that help isn’t any good, look elsewhere. Thanks again for writing in anon.
Oloni
Oloni may I just say that what you are doing is amazing honestly I’m so happy you’re doing what your doing sex & relationships amongst the black community in the U.K. Seems like such a taboo subject and I’m generally so pleased that you have given women a platform in general to discuss anything. You’re so awesome lma
3. August 2017
thank you!!
oloni
Hi Oloni, I need help my head is all over the place. I’ve been in a relationship for about 6 years and we have a child together. However I feel like he is such an asshole. He hardly helps with our daughter and often just goes out for hours leaving her with me. I’m exhausted but when I express this he calls me lazy. If I ask him for help or anything he literally launches into a string of abuse calling me stupid worthless etc. I’ve caught him cheating several times but he tells me that I’m imagining things or he’ll flip it and ask why am I stalking him. Saying that he can’t trust me as I used to message other guys when we just got together (this is 6 years ago). I just feel so broken and like a nag, I’m constantly unhappy and he does not ever compliment me. I’ve spent the last few years begging for a date and we’ve only been out once. He’s point blank refuses to even go anywhere with me and our daughter since she was born. I just can’t do it anymore. And when I say I want to leave he starts calling me selfish for wanting to. He says I’m being evil because when I was homeless he took me in. But now I know he has no way of surviving I’m leaving him in it. I’ve never felt so guilty for wanting to be happy. Im just stuck and I don’t know what to do. Help
3. August 2017
Hey my love, thank you so much for writing into me. There are so many women who are in similar positions and I’ve literally spoken to some of them.
The first thing I say? Leave. You need to leave and why? Because he already has. This sort of gaslighting is the absolute worst and the guilt he makes you feel is shameful on his part.
You and your child deserve to be happy! Kids can usually pick up when things at home aren’t okay, so please don’t let your child think what you’re going through is normal.
I can’t express enough how much he needs to be out of the house. So he took you in when you first had a child? Does he think he’s mother thereasa? You were carrying HIS child. You don’t owe him anything. You don’t owe anyone a damn thing who treats you terribly. That isn’t how life works sis.
If he won’t leave, then you should. Find a friend, a family member, go to your council.
He doesn’t deserve your magic.
Oloni
Hi Oloni I need your help. Help a guy this time? I love my ex. I’ve broken up with her and after the third time she said she was done. I understand her side but I just don’t get how if it’s love something this small would be a deal breaker it just doesn’t make sense to me. I’ve been under massive amounts of stress and I know I haven’t treated her good, haven’t treated her the way she deserves to be. She has changed my life monumentally and I do not want to lose her. How can I get her back, I’ve gotten my stress under control and I understand I cannot be impulsive. I’m scared. I love her. Help ?
3. August 2017
Heya! Thanks for writing in. I think you should give her some space and if you still feel the same try calling.. not texting… calling, then explain to her what you explained to me. Perhaps ask to meet up even?
Subscribe To Our Newsletter
Sign up to our mailing list to read our sex and relationship features first.
You have Successfully Subscribed!