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Hello! I was adopted by an English white family (I’m Jamaican by birth) and my whole life my family tried to suppress my culture and tried to keep me from my origins as much as they could, and I never noticed because I was just a child. However I just started uni and I met this amazing Jamaican guy and we’ve been seeing each other and when my family visited, they said I could invite him to lunch with us. They were really nice to him but after told me they thought that I should find someone else because I wasn’t like “his people”. But I literally am? I’m so confused. And angry. Where do I go from here?
19. October 2017
Your parents are racist and you need to have an open conversation about what you’ve noticed.
Oloni
Hello Oloni, I’ve been with my boyfriend for 9 months and everything was cool at first. I ended up getting pregnant 3 months into our relationship. I was slightly scared but due to us arguing, he told me it would be best to wait to have a child. Now I’m pregnant again and I want to keep the baby this time but his telling me his not ready and babies are expensive etc. I’m still currently hurting over the first abortion and it’s like his not taking my feelings into consideration at all. Do you think it’s time to step away and take care of my child by myself?
19. October 2017
Hey love, I never tell people what to do when it comes to having an abortion, but what I will say is that, if you’ve been there before and struggled, be very careful and think about your next move.
Try speaking to a nurse about your options. If you decide to continue with your poregnancy, there’s a chance that your boyfriend may not be able to support you financially or emotionally, but don’t allow him to pressure you into doing something you can’t handle. It’s not right. Try speaking to a close family memeber who you trust.
Oloni
Hi Oloni… I’ve just recently broke up with my partner after I looked through his phone& found out he was speaking to some girl & within the messages I caught on that they had slept together. – whilst I was watching his son. He recently came in touch with a lot of cash & for him that was the answer for a lot of things he would give me money here there but I didn’t feel like we could speak to him like he used to- the money basically changed him… I’ve confronted him about the messages and typical man he ain’t even apologised for what he has done, but had flipped things on me saying everyone was right about me I’ve changed since he’s got money- which is not true. He even accused me of cheating because he feels I must have been guilty of something to go through his phone. We’ve lived together and after the way he has spoken to me I’ve told him to leave on Friday, I thought why should I give him till next week and do you know what he did.. went straight to see the girl he has been cheating on me with. Oloni I’m actually heartbroken about it all because I really truly love & care for him still but I just thought I can’t let him take me for a mug! I just can’t help but think have I done the right thing…
19. October 2017
That’s so disgusting. But I think you’ve done the right thing by asking him to leave. His response has told you everything you need to know about who he truly is, including his actions of where he has chosen to stay. It may not feel like it now, but you did what was needed. He has no respect for the relationship you had or you as a person. Having money doesn’t mean you get to treat those you love with terrible treatment.
Right now, it’s best that you heal from this situation. Try to keep yourself busy and around some close friends.
Oloni
What’s the best way to make things up to your boyfriend when you fuck up?
19. October 2017
Give him space, when he is ready to talk, apologise about your mistake. Have a long conversation, perhaps get him something small? Depends on how long you’ve been in the dog house for.
Oloni
Hey oloni, my girl of 1yr and me got into an argument and I want to know if I’m in the wrong. A few months ago my girl told me she was going clubbing, I got annoyed angry everything but I calmed down and ended up taking her to the club myself that night she wanted to go with her friends. For someone that doesn’t go clubbing in general it took a lot to watch my girl go clubbing and me not be there inside wth her (not once did she offer for to join her and her friends knowing her bestfriend/cousins man was there with her cousin) after getting over that whole situation she wants to go clubbing again (2months later) and when I said obviously I can’t stop you from going but that’s not ganna stop from telling her I don’t like it when she goes clubbing specially when I ain’t there and she gets all angry saying I’m manipulating and controlling when I’ve never stopped her from going anywhere ever so I’m confused. I was meant to meet her father this December but in a past couple of weeks that became uncertain n now we’re broken up
19. October 2017
I’d break up with your ass too. Why are you getting angry and so over protective when your girl says she wants to go out? Being in a relationship shouldn’t stop her from enjoying her friends company from time to time. If you wanted an invite you should have expressed that, but it seems like you just don’t want her in the space of several others. That’s not cool.
You shouldn’t be turning super saiyan, when your parnter says they want to have a night out. It’s odd and shows you might have some insecurities.
Oloni
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