Ask me sex and relationship questions here anonymously. Please make questions as *brief* as possible to make sure you get a response. Please be aware that some dilemmas may be posted on social media platforms and cannot be removed on there or Ask Oloni once submitted. Not all questions sent can be answered due to the high amount received daily. For a QUICK response book aprivate callhere
Dear Oloni Now I’m not one to bring my relationship issues out like but honestly Oloni I don’t what to do. So basically I’m in my second year of uni and I have an essay to write, but my laptop is in repair so my boyfriend let me borrow his… so here’s my issue, so I’m working and in the notifications of my boyfriends MacBook I see Dropbox pop up and it says “Wank bank updated” so me being nosey I “accidentally” clicked it and God give me strength Oloni this boy has a folder full of his ex. Nudes, sexy selfies and videos. I don’t know if I should ask him about it or if I should just pretend as if everything is cool. Like Oloni, a whole folder… what do I do?
15. November 2017
“Wank bank” woah lol. Yeah, I’d say talk to him about it, if it makes you uncomfortable. It’s normal to have memories with past lovers, even if they’re both naked. He might even get rid of it.
Oloni
Hi Oloni, My boyfriend is an emotional abuser. I suffer with depression and after weeks of trying to hide it I finally told him. He pretended to care for approximately the work day then proceeded to tell me “you’re just in a mood” “I’ve tried to be sympathetic but you make it so hard”. He hadn’t had a job for some time (we’re talking years) & I was supporting him. Now he has a job and prospects in ‘the industry’ he keeps saying to me don’t leave cos another girl will be spoiled and have all you worked for. I am so unhappy but he made me loose my friends over the years. I feel so alone. I want to be happy but I am so scared to leace, especially as he says he will stalk me and hurt any man he finds me with in the future. He jokes abiut killing me if I were to ever move on. I know the obvious answer is leave, its just so much harder in practise especially when I have nobody else.
15. November 2017
I’m honestly so sorry to hear what you’re going through. What he’s making you experience is very sick and extremely unhealthy. I know it’s easier said than done, but being alone is far better than being with such a monster. The longer you spend in this relationship, the harder it will become to leave. Do you have any close family members that you could possibly talk to? I’d also advise seeing a therapist, someone more skilled than I am, especially as you’re going through depression.
Hi Oloni, I recently met a fine ass older man who appears interested in me. Problem is, I did some preliminary stalking there’s a chance that he’s married. Well
15. November 2017
There isn’t a problem, come on.
Oloni
Hi Oloni, I just found out my boyfriend of 5years cheated on me two years ago. The most painful part was that it happened during the period i lost my mother. I’ve confronted him about it and he insists that it was just ‘talking’, no sex. I’ve decided to take sometime apart but i need some advise on how best to handle this. Really confused.
11. November 2017
I’m really sorry about your loss. It’s disgusting that someone who should be there for you is entertaining other women in your moment of need. You did the right thing by taking a break from this relationship. The problem now is, is he really telling the truth? Was is just “talking”. Cheaters are usually liars, so that’s up to you to believe and decide.
Surround yourself with friends and family, people who care about you.
He’s taken your love granted and right now, it’s best you have some alone time to decide whether you can forgive and forget, or break up with him.
Hi oloni so this is my dilemma. So I got married in June and I asked one My best friend of almost 15 years, we both attended secondary school and uni together. When I got engaged she didn’t seem so ecstatic, like you would expect your friend of that long to be, like helping you with your bridal shower following you to your bridal fitting at least a bit effort like my others friends did. But knowing her personality I didn’t take it to heart. Any way a couple of months before my wedding she said she wasn’t attending as she couldn’t afford it! Although she was traveling around the world and posting pictures of new bags but she couldn’t afford to be in the wedding. either way I offered to put up most of the expenses she said she still couldn’t attend weird right. She ended up not attending my wedding. She messaged me long apology her excuse was so lousy claiming she gained a bit of weight and she didn’t feel comfortable in the dress complete bs. Till this day I haven’t spoke to her she has tried countless of times even asking our friends to talk to me. Do you think I’m being petty and childish should I continue being her friend or am I right to cut her off
11. November 2017
There could be a number of reasons she was acting it up. I honestly think she was a jealous bitch that you should get rid of. Not attending your wedding AFTER you offered to help out is unforgivable. Who behaves like that? An enemy.
Putting on weight is not an excuse either, the day isn’t about her.. aint nobody looking at her.
In all seriousness, give your ex-friend a chance and speak to her. See what she has to say and make up your mind from there.
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