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Ask me sex and relationship questions here anonymouslyPlease make questions as *brief* as possible to make sure you get a response. Please be aware that some dilemmas may be posted on social media platforms and cannot be removed on there or Ask Oloni once submitted. Not all questions sent can be answered due to the high amount received daily. For a QUICK response book a private call here

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Hey. I’ve been seeing this guy for like a month now. I’m not ready for a relationship because I find it hard to trust and we’ve just met. He’s not ready for a relationship neither but his reasons are because he wants to focus on his career. He’s a busy guy but makes time for me. He’s attentive, although it’s only a month and abit we are exclusive. However it is my birthday today. He was the first to message me which was sweet but he hasn’t made plans yet.. Do I tell him I want to do something? I don’t expect any presents but I want to do something. 6. May 2015

Yes, voice it it’s no biggie if you want to spend the day with someone you’re casually dating.


I’ve been talking to this guy for atleast 6 months. We haven’t had sex and he hasn’t pressured me into it either just kissed. We talk practically every day phone calls and messages, however recently the communication has drifted i feel like im bothering him. But yh we hardly meet up. Which really irritates me and i dont understand why speak to me so often but don’t try n see me often. I have spoken to him about, he says he wants to see me. I even make it obvious and say i want to see him and doesn’t happen often. im sure its been a month now since i last saw him. Should i just give it a rest and find someone that actually wants to make time for me? 6. May 2015

Yes, he’s lost interest and that’s fine, cus you’re going to move on.


My fwb is a close friend of mine. We get on so well and spend so much time together, too much time I think. From what I know I don’t think fwb should spend a whole week + together even when they’re not having sex. I’ve told him this too he agrees but we still spend endless amounts of time together. I enjoy his company we get on very well but I know this will lead to me catching feelings. When I told him this we agreed to stop sleeping with each which worked for a bit but now we’re back to the same routine. He admits that we’re more than fwb but will say that I shouldn’t turn down any other guys just because we’re sleeping together but with the amount of time we do spend together me seeing anyone would be hard. I don’t know what he wants tbh. What should I do?? 6. May 2015

You were never FWB’s to begin with, FWB’s do not spend nearly as much time as you described together. It’s in and out. That routine does not include hanging out, ever. He has already explained how he feels about the situation, believe him. All you can do now, is carry on (but you might get hurt) all cut him off completely to save yourself.


Hi Oloni I met a guy in the beginning of January, he took my number and we started talking. He says he really likes but isn’t ready to put a label on it yet. But anyways we talk everyday, he says he denies every girl that comes his way and I recently I have started to stay totally loyal to him aswell. But around the beginning of April we finally had sex. Is this too early? Is it bad because I’m not exactly his girlfriend yet? I’m confused? 6. May 2015

It’s been a few months since you’ve been speaking, if it felt right then it wasn’t soon. Some people have a feeling when they know tthey’ve slept with a guy too early on. However remember what his words were.. he doesn’t want to put a label on things, its been four months either he’s lying and still playing the field or it’s just not what he wants.. at all.


My boyfriend doesn’t know how to dress, like literally his dress sense reminds me of them African mums who dress their kids, you know with the jeans that are swinging and all that lol, but how do I confront him about it? Not sure the positive compliments of when he wears something nice would really work. HELP. 6. May 2015

It really depends on what he’s like as a person. Would he be open to the idea of getting a new wardrobe? I think it’s sweet when couples go shopping together, perhaps you can suggest that. Just don’t go changing him completely.


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