Ask me sex and relationship questions here anonymously. Please make questions as *brief* as possible to make sure you get a response. Please be aware that some dilemmas may be posted on social media platforms and cannot be removed on there or Ask Oloni once submitted. Not all questions sent can be answered due to the high amount received daily. For a QUICK response book aprivate callhere
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Hi Oloni, I’m a proud African British raised young woman ad I’ve always been attracted to white guys. I just got into a new relationship with a guy who is white and things are going really well. My question is how do I tell my parents that I’m in an Interracial relationship when they are very protective of our culture? I don’t want to hide my relationship from them especially as I always get the “Why don’t you have a Boyfriend?” question. Do you have any tips? Thanks.
19. July 2015
Well you’re British! So there was a chance you’d be with someone who doesn’t share the same complexion as yourself. Talk to either of your parents and speak to them about your preferences in the opposite sex. Remember to do whatever makes YOU happy.
Hi Oloni, I hope you can help me with my issue. I work in a pharmacy and I enjoy working there. The environment and people are great but lately my boss (who is 10yrs older and married with 4 kids) has been acting some kind of way. I wasn’t sure whether he was flirting with me or just joking inappropriately. Either way, I felt uncomfortable. One night, I was working a late shift (our pharmacy closes at midnight) and it was closing time. It was only me and my boss and he started asking inappropriate stuff like “when was the last time you were intimate with a guy?” and “have you ever slept with a married man?”and “have you tried an older man?” All of which I told him it wasn’t his business. Suddenly, he got mad and started shouting at me saying “You work for me and do as I please?” So I just ran out and went home. Next day, I received a call from the owners of the pharmacy saying I need to see them urgently. The owners was told by my boss that I disrespected him and didn’t follow his orders. So now I have been put on probation for 3 weeks. If I mess up I am gone. I had enough sense to apply for other jobs but nothing has come up and I live and study overseas (so I have to pay my uni fees up front and living costs don’t come cheap). What do you think I should do? I want to tell the owner what happened that night, but my boss has already lied on me so I can only imagine what I would look like to the owner.
19. July 2015
So sorry to hear about this harassment. Yes, you should tell the direct boss and file a complaint, what he did made you feel very uncomfortable. I do hope you find a new job because I wouldn’t advise you stay at this place. It’s a shame because you mentioned you enjoy working there. However you shouldn’t work in an environment that makes you feel uneasy. I hope this does get handled properly. Please feel free to come back and let me know what happened.
I have been dating a guy for 10 months and he hasn’t said anything about what we are. I’m not sure if we are in a relationship but I don’t want to ask “are we in a relationship?” But he doesn’t tell his friends about me and says to girls he’s seeing someone but that’s all and expects me to act like his girlfriend. Am I silly ? What should I do?
19. July 2015
Bring it up. 10 months is quite a lengthy and reasonable time, so you can ask what the status of your relationship is. And don’t act like his girlfriend if you’re not, that’s how some men get comfortable and see no reason to take things to the net level. If he wants you to act one way, he’ll make it that way.
What if you don’t want your questions on social media platforms? Is there a way we can email you directly?
19. July 2015
I only take private e-mails and now phone calls from those who I’m relationship coaching. You can always get more info about it there itsoloni@gmail.com
Hi Dami. First off, congrats on all of your success so far. You’re really doing some big things and I see great things on the future for you. My problem is this, I’m 22 and have been speaking/messaging this boy for about 5 months now but we haven’t met yet. Our talk is always sexual but recently we haven’t been talking as much as before. I have the feeling we both want to meet each other probs for sex which I am up for, but the problem is I’m really not confident with my body and not sure if I can do it no matter how much I want to. Is there any advice you could give me. Please don’t put this on the tl as well thanks.
19. July 2015
If you’re just interested in the physical then try to boost your confidence by getting lingerie that makes you feel comfortable in the moment. I’ve worked in two of the most popular lingerie outlets in the UK and have spoken to women who admit it makes them feel more confident as they can be quite insecure. Do remember to talk about contraception and make sure if the times comes and you don’t feel up for it, you don’t have to do anything. Only have sex when you feel at ease to.
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