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Dear Oloni, I have a new man and I invited him to a drink up with my girls. I had expressed to my girls previously that I really liked the guy but I have trust issues. I also have told the guy this too. to cut a long story short, one of my girls had sex with the guy at this drink up however she did ask me if it was ok and in my drunk state I said she should ‘do her ting’ and I also handed her condoms. Now I did not actually expect her to have sex with him and I assumed she could tell from my body language that I was not cool with that however him, her and some of my other friends are saying I said it was fine so I am basically in the wrong as I should have expressed clearly how I felt. Was I wrong or do these people need to get the axe?? <3
29. April 2018
…you gave her the condoms. That was practically your blessings.
Oloni
SO OLONI, WHERE DO I START!? I have been with my boyfriend for seven years and things have been… mostly good. Anyway, fast forward to this year and it’s been rocky. We went through a phase of just constant arguing. Present day now and there was an emergency and I needed to go through his phone to find someones contact details. I end up seeing multiple new snapchat adds and a message wanting to take someone on a date. I confronted him and he says he just wanted the attention and wasn’t really gonna go through with it. Oloni am I being a fool because I know the answer? But seven years of my life?
29. April 2018
Yikes. He has more explaining to do, because that lie he told you is NOT going to cut it. If you never went through his phone he would be on date number 3 sis.
I can’t tell you whether or not to walk away, but this is a very good reason to. Seven years or not, he played you. In a lot of relationships, what you choose to forgive may continue.
Oloni
I’ve been sleeping my my youth pastor for about 7 months now. He was celibate before me and we both couldn’t resist temptation any longer. He says he has feelings for me but can not compromise his faith by being in a relationship with me or letting people or our friends know about us whereas I’ve been ready since the first month I met him to commit to him. We have sex after every service and on Wednesdays so how much further could his faith be compromised? I know he is a man of God and would treat me well and take good care of me, which is why I don’t want to lose him. He is also an amazing lover. However, 8 months is such a long time to be doing what we are in secrecy with no promise of a future together. Do you think I should continue our love story And be patient out of respect for our beliefs or give him an ultimatum about our future? Please help
29. April 2018
Hy love, the longer this continues the deeper you’ll fall for him. It’s weird that his own actions aren’t matching his words (in terms of intimacy). However, I think it’s best you listen to what he’s told you. If he’s not after a relationship, end it.
Oloni
“Dear Oloni, I just want to be a free hoe but all these guys want to get serious and all fall in love with me. I’m a Scorpio so therefore inadvertently a sexual being but I cba for have boys falling in love with me once we get intimate. How can I be a hoe but avoid boys falling for me?!!?!!??”
26. April 2018
Lol you make it clear before sex that you want nothing more.
Oloni
Hey hun I have a bit of a different question. I’m romantically talking to a guy that goes to my church. He has a mild learning disability. Most people don’t really notice and just think he’s quirky and shy but when he’s comfortable around you his personality shines. He’s smart, he’s funny, he’s kind, he’s handsome, he’s very intelligent and ambitious with a degree and a career. He’s had no problems with achieving his goals whatsoever. The only issue is that his mum is really protective of him which I can understand. My best friend at the time made fun of him and embarrassed him in front of the whole Sunday school class when we were like 10 years old. To his mum, she still associates that incident with me, even though I didn’t say anything (which was wrong, I should have). This was almost 15 years ago and I have since apologised. I don’t even talk to my old best friend anymore. He forgives me but his mum still doesn’t like me. He’s tried talking to her but she’s agreed to give me a chance. What can I do to win aunty over please lol?
26. April 2018
Loool aww aunty needs to get a grip you were 10 years old for fuck sake. Hahaha aww this is too friggin cute! Okay, I think just going out of your way to be nice to her should be enough for her to warm up to you. It could take some time, especially as she’s clearly quite guarded about her son. Just be patient, I have a feeling it’ll all work out.
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