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Sorry, I fell asleep
Hey Oloni! After spending a year focusing on myself and keeping men out of my life, I’ve finally decided to jump back into the dating scene. Started talking to two guys off bumble, went on a date with one and going on a date with the other one soon. Problem is, the next day after my date he said that he would have taken me to his house, and even the day before our date he was speaking really sexual to me that I had to air him cause I was feeling really anxious about it all. The other guy talks speaks sexual to me too, when I told him I was going to wear a dress to our date, he said that he wants to see my bum popping out of it. Both say they want something serious but do they really? It doesn’t seem normal to me that you can want something serious but talk about sex and that so early
5. October 2018
Yeah, when a guy talks about sex so early on and leads with being overly sexual that’s usually what they’re after.
My boyfriend keeps bringing up his exs. He says he misses her company and friendship nothing romantic. Am I mad or is he mad please let me know what you think
5. October 2018
He’s hella mad. New boyfriend please.
Hi Oloni, I’ve been sleeping with my ex boyfriend (stupid I know) we were together for 3 years. Now I’m catching feelings again & he said he just wants to be friends so I’ve cut it all off completely ie not even speaking to him now because I don’t want to make my feelings worse and I want to get over him for good. Do you think we can ever actually be “friends” without me feeling a certain way again or will it always be there? I actually miss him as a friend. I’m so stuck 🙁 please help me
5. October 2018
Heya love! You’ve recognised the issue, so it’s good that you have distanced yourself. It’s a healthier decision which allows you to move on emotionally. You could become friends, you might not and while I get that you miss your friendship, it’s vital to let that idea go for now and focus on just moving on.
Once you’ve done that, after some time perhaps you could explore those options in terms of friendship.
Oloni
Hi Oloni. My boyfriend came to me with some nonsense the other day. I say nonsense because I’m actually triggered. Any way I digress. His best friend (ain’t never met the chick) is pregnant and her baby father is in jail, family are shit basically and majority of them substance abusers. He asked me if he can go to the birth and be her birthing partner next week. Should I just dash him and say f u. I need help. Am I over reacting or is he a human dick head? SOS
5. October 2018
Whew. Well i know what will be question of the day later.
I understand he wants to be a good friend, but this is way too much. Doesn’t she have any female friends?
I don’t think I’d feel comfortable if another woman asked my partner to be involved in the delivery of her baby. It’s a big deal and a very emotional moment which can create mixed signals. I’m sure women release all sorts of hormones during this time as well. Nope. Messy.
Tell him how you feel!
Oloni
How soon is too soon to get into a relationship after just getting out of one??? X I just got out of a hugely toxic relationship (literally 4 days ago). I made a new friend about 5 weeks ago and he treats me how I deserve. I’m falling for him but I don’t know if it’s too soon!!??
5. October 2018
I would advise taking it slowly especially as your last relationship was toxic. I say this because when you leave something awful you assume that the new warm feeling is 100x better, when in reality it’s not as amazing as you think. There’s a chance your past relationship could cloud the judgment of how great your new situation is.
Heal first!
Oloni
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