Why Communication Is Key

Recently I have been reflecting heavily on the concept of communication in relationships (both friendship and romantic wise) and how a lot of the time, what seems like an obvious building block to connecting with a fellow human, seems to be one of the most difficult skills to assert.

The one thing that seems to be a major struggle between a couple (in a romantic relationship particularly) is communicating on the developing and forever evolving thoughts and feelings blossoming between one other.

Why does this seem to be such a difficult thing to achieve? I mean, all you have to do is open up your mouth and say words right? If only it were that simple. Actually it is, but almost instinctively in some scenarios we automatically fall into the default reactions of holding back, playing psychological games like,

 “I am not going to text him, I am going to wait until he texts me first. If he doesn’t text me back by 9pm, I’m blocking him!”

Or simply feeling self conscious and afraid to say what we really feel about what is happening. Sometimes we hold back because we are unsure if we are ready to reveal our vulnerabilities to somebody, especially if it is early days. This is fair enough as we do have to be cautious when dealing with matters of the heart, but certain occasions call for clarity, and that dreaded uncomfortable ‘talk’ is necessary in order to move forward. We always desire to know where we stand in most situations, and communicating effectively is the only way to achieve this directly.

I had previously touched on the necessity of communication in a previous post, and I am here to emphasise again that COMMUNICATION IS KEY.

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Once communication breaks down in a relationship, everything else seems to fall apart after that. Good communication is a fundamental part of a growing healthy relationship, and is important in maintaining that relationship. It is also the door to confronting any barrier or diffuse any conflict that you are bound to encounter within your relationship.

It is also a tool that can prevent many minor issues or misunderstandings from even occurring in the first place, allowing for more stability and less toxicity between you and your partner.

In today’s technology dependent generation, we at many times rely too heavily on ‘indirect’ grievances that are usually communicated via virtual reality. Posting up meme’s and statuses that have some harsh truths relating to the person we are dating or seeing but not actually tagging their name, in the hopes that they see it and silently start fuming. This method doesn’t always do much to improve communication issues but rather adds fuel to a fire of unresolved emotions. The only way to resolve these unsaid issues is to actually confront them with the person, preferably verbally.

It is easy to get lost in unspoken emotions and assumptions which can end up being quite destructive (emotionally), leading to over thinking and developing insecurities. My overall message for today is to not be afraid to express yourself at any stage of your relationship/growing connection.