Ask me sex and relationship questions here anonymously. Please make questions as *brief* as possible to make sure you get a response. Please be aware that some dilemmas may be posted on social media platforms and cannot be removed on there or Ask Oloni once submitted. Not all questions sent can be answered due to the high amount received daily. For a QUICK response book aprivate callhere
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Hi Oloni, I was with my boyfriend for 2 years – he was my first everything and the only man I had ever slept with. We broke up briefly for one month and later reconciled, and I asked him if he had slept with anyone else while we weren’t together. I said I’d prefer if he was honest – and he said no. After trying to make it work again and it failing, a month on after not speaking he tells me he caught chlamydia and that I should get checked meaning he lied to me. Thanks to you, I went to the clinic two days before he messaged me just to be sure that I was completely clean. I just wanted to express my gratitude for the awareness you spread to women like myself!
28. February 2019
So glas to hear this1 Health is wealth.
Oloni
Hi Oloni, so I met this guy who is probably perfect, but my main attraction to him was the connections he has in the industry he works in, which would be super helpful for my career. I’m not really the type to go and finesse but that’s kind of what I’ve been doing. Now I’m actually with him officially and just not happy. He’s a lovely person but I’m just not feeling him, but if I dead it, I feel like my career will just be moving backwards. What should I do?
29. January 2019
Oh Lordy. “Is it me, or the clout?”
You’re just punishing yourself by staying in a commitment which makes you unhappy. You could still end up ending on good terms, but regardless.. it’s not a great idea to be with him just because of what he can do, when you’re not there emotionally. If you were with him for his connects and the fact he made you happy this wouldn’t bad at all.
Oloni
I’ve slept with 20 people, and I’m aged 20. I’m somewhat embarrassed and my friends are all telling me to lie and lessen this number to help find a boyfriend. What should I do?
29. January 2019
LOL your friends aren’t completely wrong and I understand. Sadly due to how a woman’s sexuality is seen we omit the truth. Who you’ve slept with is no one’s business, what should matter is how enjoyable it was, what you learned about your sexuality and if you’ve been checked recently.
Oloni
Hi Oloni, love your work!!! So here goes. In the early stages of our relationship the guy I was dating was still with his girlfriend. He kept it from me and I found out 😳. Massive blow up, I didn’t speak to him for a year. Since that, built back a friendship, I chose to forgive him and we now have a great relationship 3 years later. The problem is, my brother who really close to absolutely hates this guy and does not want me to be with him because he said he’s a cheater that will never change and disrespected me. Most of my family who knew about the situation disprove of the relationship too. Do I listen to them or listen to my heart? I really do believe he’s changed plus whilst I’m not excusing what he did, he was very young and has matured a great deal since then. Please help 😭 this is the man I want to marry!
29. January 2019
Your family will always want to protect you from hurt. It’s natural. However, if you feel like he has changed and hasn’t given you a reason to question his loyalty, he probably has grown.
Do what feels right.
Oloni
Hi Oloni. I know you’re not a doctor, but can you please tell me if I have vaginismus. First of all, I am DEATHLY afraid of penetration. I only just started having sex about a month ago. Before that, all the times I’d tried were way too painful. Now I have done it twice with my current boyfriend (Im not always comfortable during but I assume that’s part of the early stages of it all). I tried to have sex again today but I was so scared and kept whimpering and my vagina is so sore. He tried to put the tip in and I felt so sore and begged him to stop. He got frustrated and I felt bad, then got mad and left. Do I have vaginismus?
29. January 2019
You could do. I would suggest seeing a doctor. I hope it does get sorted. Sorry you’re experiencing this.
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