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Basically I have this one friend that I’ve known for some years since secondary school. I remember going to her house and she would always have to take medication. I didn’t know what it was for because I didn’t know much about medication. One day she left it out and I saw the label, it was for HIV. I knew this because we learned about it in school and the treatments and stuff. So yeah that’s the backstory. Recently she has started to have sex. She has just turned 18 now. I am sexually active too and let her know I was on the pill and I was on the implant later. She asked me where I go because she hates using condoms. I thought this was really strange because of her status which then led me to think that her parents may not have really told her about her status because I think she was born with it since she has taken these meds for as long as I can remember. I didn’t tell her where I go because she might go and then stop using condoms. I don’t think the guy she is sleeping with knows about her status and she doesn’t know I know either. Should I tell her that I know so that I can advise her to keep practising safe sex? I find it hard to tell her now without sounding like a hypocrite because I don’t use a condom with my boyfriend. I want to let her know that I know and she shouldn’t be sleeping with guys without condoms given her status because she will put them at risk. Help! I don’t want to be mean to her
2. July 2015
I apologise for seeing this really late. Because of what you saw I think it’s better you have a conversation with her about it. You can do so in a friendly way, during a conversation. Besides if she doesn’t go to your clinic it’s very easy to google a local one. You’re human so it’s natural for us to be hyporcrtical however you’re also educating her in case she puts someone elses life at risk.
Please make this QOTD as I really need proper Insight into this topic. I am a girl and I love smoking weed. I don’t drink or do other drugs but weed is my thing. I’m starting to feel as though my habit and recreational preference is affecting the kind of guys that’s come my way. Mainly guys who ate happy for me to come round theirs and have a smoke. This is fine at first until I realise we are in a habit of “chilling Indoors smoking”. Do guys find weed smoking girls easy targets for sex and chilling? Are there other girls who have this problem?
1. July 2015
What you do in the privacy of your own space is down to you. However, regardless of what you’re doing, constantly going round a guys house to ‘chill’ ‘smoke’ ‘netflix’ always gives them an excuse to try it. If you’d prefer it not to lead to anything else, offer another form of activity to participate in.. Such as going out! You’re more than likely going to attract someone who has the same interests as you. So if you enjoy smoking cannabis, you’ll attract men who don’t mind it & will participate or enjoy it with you.
Hi oloni me and my boyfriend have been going out for about two three months now but we were very good friends before. Before we officially got together we knew we liked each other and had sex and all this while he was pursuing other girls whilst having me think I was the only one because he claimed to have “commitment issues”. Obviously I wasn’t aware of what he was doing but distanced myself away from him when I found out. He then decided to drop the other girls because he wanted to be with me and I agreed to it after making him work for a while. Anyway my dilemma is he still chats to one of the girls he was chatting to before he also never opens their chat when I’m around but is very open and okay with me reading anyone else’s conversations. Should I be worried or am I just being insecure and paranoid
1. July 2015
If it bothers you tell him how you feel & express what you’ve noticed. See what he says.
Hey Oloni, I hope you get to see this, I know how busy it can busy it can be on hear. Do you think 21 is too young to be doing online dating? Thing is I’m super shy and the whole letting a guy know I’m interested is a myth to me. I don’t have many friends and like I said I’m super shy. Should online dating be the last stretch for me? Thanks.
1. July 2015
21 is not too young, plus it can help boost your confidence.
Hey Oloni Ive been with my Mr for 3 years n he confessed that he cheated on me twice. Since finding this out he’s adamant that they were both mistakes because he was on two minds about whether he still wanted to be in this relationship with me. After doing what he did he realised that it was one of the biggest mistakes he’s made. Ok… I’m willing to forgive him but I’ve got this thing niggling in the back of my mind that it might happen again and I don’t even know what steps to take to start this process of forgiving him. If he’s willing to spend time making it up to me and I’m willing to move on is it worth it?
30. June 2015
Only you know if it’s worth it. I don’t know what the nature of your relationship is like. Is he a good boyfriend? Is this something you can move past? Will you be able to trust him? Cheating once shows uncertainty, but twice? You need to have a serious conversation
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