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Hey Oloni! I’m in a 3 month relationship and my boyfriend is already talking marriage. Granted, he’s much older than me, but I am just not ready. I do see a future with him, but I’m finding it hard to look past the red flags. He is a little too insecure and controlling. Really don’t know what to do.
22. December 2020
Take the relationship at your own pace not his. I’d also say that you should pay attention to red flags, especially during the early days. Don’t leave it too long before you bring it up or decide to leave.
Oloni
My sister has started seeing someone ive previously been in love with (and vice versa) me and him are still good friends and I jokingly said to ask her out, she doesn’t know the extent of our past beyond a fling and its really made me feel awkward about it all. Do I have a right to be upset?
22. December 2020
So weird. Why did you encourage it? Speak to your sister and tell her how you feel.
Oloni
I had sex with this guy I met within two days now I’m lost in sauce he hasn’t messaged me since and it’s been like 4 days. To be fair to him I did say friends with benefits but now I think I’m sick whipped should I message him or leave it
22. December 2020
Take the L and learn from this situation.
Oloni
My boyfriend has made it clear that he is not willing to speak in english to his friends (alot of them are female aunties) and he knows i only can understand a small amount of words, i have voiced that i do not like him not speaking english to them (family is understandable) and that I would NEVER speak in a different language around him as I find it rude. As he is not willing to do this, it gives me a feeling that i want to leave him as I cannot tolerate it. He does not respect my wishes right? I love him so much but I cant take it anymore
11. November 2020
Unless he can’t speak English fluently and they can’t speak English, he’s being an irritant for no reason. Let him know that this is making you reconsider how you feel about him and go from there. If nothing changes, it might be time to seriously think about the future of your relationship.
Oloni
Hey Oloni, I’m in a long distance relationship rn (Scotland-London) and today is my birthday – with restrictions and all we couldn’t meet and celebrate but I at least expected to get one of my first hbd wishes from him. Morning passed, I got messages from distant family, friends, even his own mum but didnt hear anything from him till a good few hours later. He doesn’t work on the weekends so sending me a message in the afternoon is making me feel like I’m an afterthought/ he’s not taking me seriously and it’s really ruining my day. Am I making too big a deal out of nothing or am I right to be mad? P.s. today is his brother’s birthday too but if his mum was able still reached out to me early in the day, why couldn’t he?
11. November 2020
It really does depend on what type of person he is in general. I definitely don’t think you should make a big deal out of it though, perhaps just mentally note it.
Oloni
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