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Hi Oloni, I went for a job interview and I met this cute guy who happened to be the one to interview me. After the interview he asked for my number, he texted immediately as I got home and said, that he likes me and that he’d like us to have a personal discussion. Though I think he’s cool, I really don’t like his approach. I really want this job, but I don’t think his presence will make me comfortable. What should I do?
17. January 2017
Hey hun, this is so annoying. It’s not very unprofessional of him to contact you in this way. I know you want this job but I think you should politely let him down, or use this in your favour and play dumb.
So if he contacts you again, you say something along the lines of ‘Oh is this to do with the interview that I applied for?’ Basically use wisdom to make it clear, that your only interest lies within the job offer you were interviewed for.
I really hope you get the job! Good luck.
Oloni
Hey Oloni, so I’ve been friends with this guy for around a year now and I’d say recently I’m liking him a bit more. He’s done a massive glo up and now I’m like ‘yasss lawd’. We get on so well and we always banter, he’s a big softie. I find that when we’re alone in my room he’ll grab my waist and hips and pull me in closer and find any excuse to hold me (we play fight a lot), and I feel some sort of ‘sexual’ tension between us. Even at parties we tend to spend time together and hold hands/each other. Even randomly, I’ll find him staring at me. The problem is that I’m not sure if he likes me like that. I mean he’ll joke about the guys who message me (which is not that much), and say I got all these guys on me. Deep down, I want him and I want to act on this tension (i.e kiss him) but he is shy and I don’t want things to be awkward between us as friends if anything happened, what do you think I should do??
16. January 2017
Aww yass. This is so cute lol! I think you should shoot your shot and simply ask him out on a date. You’re already friends and flirt so it won’t be a big deal. Say something like, ‘we should go out to eat some time or grab a drink’. From what you’ve described, it sounds like he’s really attracted to you, so see if the rest of that chemistry is there too.
I’ve been seeing someone for 4 months, he told me he’d slept with someone else the other day and if this was ok, I just said ok cool… because he is not my my man and I didn’t want to seem like a weirdo too early and tbh I don’t like when ppl can see that I care about them so much cos then I feel weak. When I didn’t get upset he started being nasty and saying things like what so you don’t care, you must be a hoe etc… I feel like this is my fault. Other than this we are great together and he says he wants us to be together im just not ready to be in a relationship for reasons like this, I gave trust issues and clearly I’m right to. How do you feel I should go about this, I feel like his genuinely turned this around on me and made me feel as though it’s my own fault. I know we aren’t in a relationship which makes me feel I have no right to cut it off with him just because his slept with someone else, but I’ve been loyal to him since I met him and it would be world war 3 if it were vice versa
16. January 2017
No offence but this dude sounds like a loser. Someone who cares about you will not try to get a negative reaction out of you on purpose, just because you’re not committed. Not being exclusive doesn’t mean you’re allowed to accept disrespect. He’s insensitive. He even went as far as to slut-shame you for not getting a rise from you. Bin this dude girl, he sounds extremely immature.
Oloni
Hi oloni, I was dating a guy on and off for 6 years, it is now officially come to and end to the point of no return. I’ve recently started talking to someone else that I believe is perfect for me but this person is his cousin and they are really close, I know that he doesn’t know that I’m talking to his cousin but am I fooling myself in thinking that anything could happen between in terms of beating to being together. I don’t hate my ex enough to be ok to rip his family apart but at the same time this is the only male that I’ve felt any interest in.
16. January 2017
Hey hun, I don’t see this going particularly well because this is his cousin we’re talking about. You also dated for 6 years, not 6 months. Have a conversation with him and see how he feels about it.
Oloni
Hey Oloni, I’ve been seeing this guy for 7 months now and because of his family suituations and uni he has not been working or making much money else where. We have been on serveral dates and I have paid for everything every time. At first I didn’t mind because I had hope that he would find a job, but he hasn’t. I had paid his phone bills, topped up his gas/electric and given him money. He is such a nice guy and I’ve known him for over 4 years where we were just friends. Now it’s getting very draining because I feel like he is becoming comfortable and the drive to find a job has died down. I’m not rich but I make enough money for myself and my priorities. Now he doesn’t even wait for me to offer to pay for things, he will even ask. I don’t know what to do? He is a really nice guy makes me laugh, listens to me and generally makes me happy. I just feel like his financial state is weighing me down.
15. January 2017
You need to share your concerns with him. You have every right to feel the way you do, but hun, what you allow is what will continue. Stop paying for everything, you’re not his mother or guardian. The fact that he’s so relaxed about everything is also quite concerning.
If nothing changes after you express how you feel, please let this guy go.
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