#AskOloni The Pregnancy

A month ago, I decided to switch from my amazing to ask.fm, to my even more amazing website (Here, duh.) I no longer respond to sex and relationship dilemmas via ask.fm/Oloni but at simplyoloni.com/ask. You can aslo, get there quick and easy by clicking the tab above that says ‘Ask Oloni’.

The Sex After The Break Up

‘Me and my boyfriend of three years broke up. I was so upset and angry I ended up having sex with someone else. Now it seems like me and my boyfriend are working things out again but I literally thought we were done for good when we broke up. Anyway question is, do I tell him what happened with this other guy? I don’t think he’ll get over it. He was the only person I had sex with until recently. I feel like the thought of me being with someone else will hurt him. But he broke up with me and left me in a state.’

-Anonymous

You weren’t together, so what you did out of a relationship is not his business. I understand you might feel like it’s a secret, so if you want to tell him, it’s totally down to you. I just don’t see anything positive coming out of it.

The Cheat, The Holiday &  The Laptop

‘Hi Oloni, two months ago I broke up with my ex boyfriend after I found out he had cheated on me twice with a girl he had claimed was just a friend. During our one year relationship he gave me laptop to help me get through this year at uni. However now he is claiming he wants it back. Usually I wouldn’t hesitate to give it back but a month ago when I tried to give it back he said I can keep it. Now all of a sudden he has changed his mind. Another reason why I feel like I shouldn’t give it back is because during our relationship, I paid for a romantic 5* holiday for his birthday. He knew how hard I worked to pay for this holiday and he still continued to cheat. He claimed that he wasn’t feeling the relationship even before I booked the holiday but failed to tell me. He insisted that I book this holiday which I think was very selfish. Personally I want to sell the laptop and get my money back from the holiday but he is threatening to get the police involved. What should I do?’

-Anonymous

My dear, he was a jerk I understand that, but it seems like you’re just after revenge. You offered to give the laptop back before calculating past expenses, plus it’s his property. Just give it back, don’t sell it. I don’t need to see a Simply Oloni reader on Judge Judy. Give him the laptop and just learn from this experience.

My Pregnancy

‘Hey Oloni, I’m 22 & married to the love of my life. We have 4 beautiful children together. My oldest is 6, and the other two are 5 & 3. I’ve recently had another and he is just 4 months old. I found out I’m 6 weeks pregnant, and I want more children but I do not physically or emotionally have the energy to bring another child into the world. My husband is very religious and will expect me to have the child. He’s told me he wanted 6 children in total. I’ve not told my husband and I don’t know what to do or where to turn. Please help.’

-Sanita

Hey Sanita, I’m sorry to hear about how you’re feeling, but the truth is this is your husband, your lover for life and you have to let him know, you have to speak up about your pregnancy.

A lot of women are going through this and simply cannot physically/emotionally handle the pressure of having more kids. As well as telling him about your new pregnancy, I think you should let him know HOW this is making you feel. It’s difficult, but this shouldn’t be ignored or done to satisfy his wishes. I really do hope things work out.

‘Hey Oloni I’m currently talking to a guy who’s significantly older than me. I don’t see the issue but my friends keep making reference to his age. It’s kinda putting me off him how can I gently tell them to stop?’

-Anonymous

You have bad friends and need to tell them how you feel about it. If YOU do not have a problem with his age, you need to politely ask them to mind their own business. It’s not them dating him.

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