Dating A Guy Who Can’t Dress – He Has To Match My Fly!
Could I date a man who didn’t know how to dress? Well I have. Will I ever? Probably. Do I want to? NO.
With that said, although style is hardly the sole characteristic to catch my eye (sense of humour and intellect are non-negotiable) I have admittedly dated a fair share of tasteless fellows. Frumpy, same coloured T-shirt day in day out type guys. Never owned a tailored suit type guys….yes it’s pitiful I know.
Growing up my parents stressed the importance of putting your best foot forward. And so I did. I grew up slowly upgrading from ballet pumps, to Steve Maddens and my very first pair of Loubotins. Literally putting my best foot forward is and has always been paramount in my list of priorities.
So when these men with a tenuous fashion sense step into my life with their ugly footwear why do I neglect my heels for sneakers? I think the relationship gurus call this compromise. I have to compromise my standards to accommodate someone else’s? I think not. Well….more like never again.
You would think that after these fellows have seen how much time and effort you put in your appearance and getting ready they would at least trade the old hoodie for a tailored blazer but no.
I can’t count the number of nights I have feigned an excuse for not wanting to hold their hand as we walked into a nice restaurant with me perfectly clad in our body hugging all black dress and matching black heels and my partner wearing a t-shirt, jeans and old dirty sneakers.
I am not saying all I want is a man who has a fashion sense. (A girl can dream though) I also don’t want one of those who obsessively study and copy all the men’s wear trends. But in my experience I have found that slobbish dressing transfers to slobbish apartment and ladies, who really has time for this? Some of us aren’t into ‘project reform a slob’ that’s not our job. (Although I used to passive aggressively tag his name on the porn for women instagram feed that uploads pictures of the most stylish men hoping he would get a hint. He never did. )
Now some have accused me of being shallow but as rapper Fabolous accurately puts it; I just need someone who can match my fly. A sense of style alone does not make a relationship but a slob does not make one easier or enjoyable either. I already clean up nice on my own so if I am going to have a better half that half better look good too.
Have you ever dated a guy who wouldn’t dress? What was it like? Tweet us over at @SimplyOloni
By Betty Kakyo