Curious About Trying A Sex Toy?
With more than a third of British men and women owning one, there are numerous benefits to using a sex toy. From delivering strong orgasms to boosting your libido, sex toys offer sensational sexual stimulation that’s just not possible through manual masturbation and sexual intercourse.
A 2009 study in Indiana USA found that vibrator use was linked to positive sexual function such as desire and the ease of orgasm, higher levels of erectile function for men and intercourse satisfaction.
The participants were also more proactive about sexual health screenings, with a greater awareness of their bodies and sexual function.
Not sure what to buy?
Owning online sex toy retailer Jo Divine, here’s my advice to choosing the right sex toy for your needs, whoever you are.
Women… Small can definitely be beautiful
When women ask about buying their first vibrator, I always ask them what they want to use it for: mainly clitoral stimulation, for internal use or a combination of both. With 70% of women enjoying orgasms through clitoral stimulation, using a clitoral stimulator such as a bullet style product is the first step into selecting a sex toy.
Don’t be deceived by the size of clitoral stimulators, they often pack a much bigger punch that you can ever imagine. From bullets to pebble shaped, ergonomically designed silicone vibrators that nestle perfectly in your hand, clitoral stimulators are ideal for both solo and couples play as they are small enough to slip between you during sex play. This is great if you struggle to orgasm during penetrative sex.
The Satisfyer Pro 2 doesn’t even vibrate – instead, it gently caresses your clitoris with sonic power waves to deliver orgasmic pleasure.
Keep it Simple
Some sex toys come with all singing, all dancing buttons, often controlled by a remote or an app you can download to your phone. My advice is keep it simple when it comes to your first sex toy: decide if you want a battery operated or rechargeable products and choose one with easy to use control buttons.
Try body massagers that double up as intimate massagers that are controlled by mains power with the push of a button. The same goes for bullets and simple internal vibrators, many of which can be controlled by one button yet still offer a range of speeds and pulsation patterns.
Ensure that you spend time playing with your product, exploring the different speed and pulsation patterns to familiarise yourself with how your new toy works prior to use.
Double the fun
Sex toys that offer both external and internal stimulation are great fun, such as Rabbit vibrators, many of which have dual controls so that the clitoral arm and internal shaft can work independently of each other. So if it all gets too much, you can turn off the vibrating or rotating shaft and enjoy just clitoral stimulation and vice versa.
Ask your friends for recommendations
According to recent statistics, nearly 60% of women own a sex toy and 75% of those who do are married. You may be surprised at how many of your friends own a toy: it is normally the quiet ones! Remember that one size doesn’t fit all and what works for your friend may not work for you as we all have different sexual needs.
Toys for the boys
Sex toys are often considered to be just for women, yet there are many that enhance male sexual pleasure and even improve sexual performance and stamina.
Men can choose from Fleshlight male masturbators that mimic the vagina, to vibrating masturbation sleeves such as the Pulse, which uses innovative pulsation plates and is designed for use with both a flaccid and erect penis.
Prostate massagers add a different level of sexual stimulation for men as they can help you to enjoy strong prostate orgasms.
Many couples often introduce sex toys into their sex play to boost their sexual satisfaction, a flagging or boring relationship, and to help them enjoy sexual pleasure beyond penetrative sex and mutual masturbation. Using a vibrating constriction ring offers sexual stimulation for you both, while gently massaging a bullet on your clitoris can help you orgasm during penetrative sex.
Your Sexual Health is important
As a sex toy retailer we only sell skin safe sex toys that are easy to clean, and pH balanced sexual lubricants. Your vagina is a well oiled machine and any changes to the delicate pH of your vagina flora can cause thrush and bacterial vaginosis, and there is nothing worse than an itching vulva or vagina.
Choosing a cheap sex toy made from jelly, latex or rubber could end up costing you more in medication to treat your vaginal infection, as well as impacting upon your sexual pleasure too.
Jelly and rubber are porous so absorb bacteria, making them difficult to clean. They also degrade over time and contain substances, such as phthlates, which may be harmful to your sex life. You can tell if a product is made from either of these from the strong smell when you remove it from the packaging.
Latex products can cause allergies and skin irritation so best avoided unless you are completely sure you do not have a latex allergy.
We only recommend silicone, hard ABS plastic, glass or metal products. Silicone in non-porous, therefore easy to clean. It also feels incredibly gentle against the delicate skin of your vagina and vulva.
Keep your sex toy clean
We recommend you wash your sex toy with soap and water after every use, drying it carefully and storing it in a cloth bag to keep it away from dust. Some people prefer to use antibacterial sex toy cleaners foams and fleeces.
Some sex toys are waterproof, but others are only splashproof so check before you dunk it into a basin of water first.
If it is a battery operated product, remove the batteries when not in use, as you would with any battery powered product.
Read the instructions
Vibrators tend to have multiple functions and modes, so read the instruction manual first to ensure you have the batteries in the right way (this is the most common phone call we get at Jo Divine when people cannot get their product to work) and to make sure you’re not somehow using it upside down or incorrectly.
If you are still struggling, speak to the retailer as any good sex toy owner will be happy to help.
Use Sexual Lubricants
Many people view lubricant in a negative light as a “problem fixer”, but actually using a sexual lubricant enhances your sex play and sexual pleasure. I’m always amazed that people really care about what they eat and use as skin care product yet fail to consider their sexual health when it comes to using a sexual lubricant.
So choose a product, such as YES Organic Lubricants that are pH balanced to that of the vagina or anus, whatever sex play you are indulging in.
YES organic water based lubricants feel close to that of your own vaginal secretions, and YES oil based lubricants enable you to last longer. However, oil based lubricants cannot be used with latex condoms, while silicone lubricants should be avoided with silicone sex toys as they may damage the material of your product.
Be aware that many commercial lubricants contain glycerin, which can cause thrush, and some even contain parabens which have no place in our bodies.
Avoid using products, such as cooking oils, body lotions and hand creams that have not been designed for sexual use, they potentially can harm your sexual health and pleasure too.
There is no single sex toy which is right for everyone. We all have differing sexual needs and experimenting with a variety of products will enable you to find the perfect one for you.
By Samantha Evans
Sexual Health and Well Being Expert at online sex toy retailer Jo Divine http://www.jodivine.
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