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Being Slutshamed

….And Why We Needed Amber Roses’s SlutWalk

It’s no secret, this blog was inspired by Ms Amber Rose and her slutwalk that took place a couple of days ago. I think what triggered this post the most was the fact that so many people misunderstood the sole purpose of her campaign. I saw one too many irritating comments floating and retweeted across my Twitter timeline.

What shocked me were remarks suggesting she was the ‘wrong’ person to run such an event. You know the same person who has had first hand experience in being slutshamed her whole life. Some people ignored the depth to her campaign. Amber Rose was taking a stand against those who try to tell women how to dress in order to ‘avoid’ being sexually assaulted. She’s educating women about safe sex, yet reaching out to those who have had their sexuality policed their whole entire lives because they are the opposite of a man. She’s a feminist and fights for equality within sexuality, on the basis of a woman being as sexually explorative as she wants without having her name besmirched. And you know what? I f*cking love her.

LOS ANGELES, CA - OCTOBER 03: Model Amber Rose (C) attends the Amber Rose SlutWalk LA at Pershing Square on October 3, 2015 in Los Angeles, California. (Photo by Amanda Edwards/WireImage)

I have been a victim of being slut shamed. Hearing that you’ve slept with someone you went on a date with or being made to feel a way because of who I chose to have consensual sex with were the ways in which I went through it. This was during university and to put simply, it’s what a lot of people at universities were guilty of doing to women. ‘Who’s a hoe?’, ‘Which girl gave what guy a blow job?’ ‘What girl doesn’t respect herself…blah blah blah’. It was never, ‘What guy promised her the world before he got some?’, or ‘What guy begged, pleaded, hounded etc..’ – It was so terrible that I recall a time a friend of mine came banging on my door crying because she had been placed on an anonymous ‘Slut Page’ . They placed a bunch of women from my university on this Facebook page and shamed them for things that were private and did it at least once every term. Though some were rumours it still didn’t change how they felt. A lot of people are unaware of the of the impact being slut-shamed has on a lot of young women. .  That’s why I wrote my ebook The Number Between Her Legs *shameless plug, hollaaa*

We’re denying the right of some women who are in touch with their sexuality and feel liberated by it. That’s why I love what Amber Rose is doing right now. She’s been there, she understands and she knows that several young women around the world are still experiencing being looked at funny because they chose to have a one night stand.

Have you ever been slut shamed? How did it affect you? Tweet us over at @SimplyOloni

 

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Dami Olonisakin

Dami Olonisakin

Editor-In-Chief and Founder of Simply Oloni.

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