How Not To Put A Dumper On Your Love Life
Several factors can affect out love life: work, family, friends, distance etc. This topic is highly individual, but let’s think about the reasons we are alone. Is it our working schedule that makes us put dates in a long drawer or constant flow of depression and anxiety, bonded with a fear of being hurt and mentally damaged? For an impressive amount of reasons, people stay lonely for the rest of their lives. If you want to get rid of this “loner” mindset and substitute the N with V, than natalydate should consider what makes us abandon the love life first:
- Our friends. Our dear, lovely friends who would always come with a valid piece of advice. But, unfortunately, people are highly subjective. Remember the time you have told your friend about a boy or a girl who seem kind of nice, but soon your comrades make the final judgmental decision for you. See, we all tend to notice things that irritate us, but can be perfectly fine for other people. During these times, we need to understand that what can be hurtful for us can be useful for comrades and vice versa. So don’t take away their chance and never things like “She will be a horrible mother/He would be so disrespectful and rude in your family life.” Let friends be friends, not your main orienteers.
- Our families. Our mothers and fathers can be great blockers, too, when it comes to relationships. Will all of their parental trepidation and fake intuition, they project all fears and possible losses when you get distant form them, and disguise it into “being experienced and considerate before it’s late”. It is worth listening to older people, but think with your own damn brains too.
- Our career aka the biggest reason you might be alone. People always have to choose whether they want to move the career stairs or stay a good boyfriend/girlfriend. Indeed, building a career and making money requires a lot of time and effort, so you skip dates, delete your accounts in order not to waste time. But you might be missing some good moments in your life with a truly incredible person. Maybe you should not be as strict to yourself.
- Our previous painful relationships. Love hurts. It takes good memories and brings us a lot of regrets and tears. But you can’t stay heartbroken forever. People and time are the best painkillers when it comes to bad experiences. You should be open to a world, because being depressed and having mental issues will only lead to more negative thoughts and bring you pain. You should attract love and joy, so it will pay you back with an amazing loving person.
So, how not to neglect your private love life?
Being an adult is pretty difficult. You need to play different roles in life such as a lover, a boss, a citizen, a son or a daughter, a brother or a sister, a friend etc.
Among all of the duties it is really hard to keep up with relationships as they always consume a lot of time and effort. If are ready for a new amazing experience, you must consider such steps:
- Be active. Run, dance, sing, go to clubs, libraries, university, job – just lead an active life without any laziness and depression. Being developed physically and socially means great opportunities. You can be engaged in some conversations, attend different meetings, talk to new people, establish social bonds that might grow into something more.
- Don’t be afraid of people. They are just humans who also need to be loved and respected, so giving them a chance won’t hurt any of the sides. Overcoming a bad experience doesn’t make your life any less valuable.
- Have time for dates. Even if you are a workaholic, force yourself to go out of your comfort zone and meet new people. Don’t say “No” to yourself all the time, dare yourself to be a little more rebellious and a little less reserved.
- Have your own opinion. Don’t let anyone blur your mind, because friends can be jealous, parents can be old-fashioned, and colleagues can be simply indifferent to what will happen after you might reject possibly the best person in your life.