Ask Oloni

Ask me sex and relationship questions here anonymously. Please make questions as *brief* as possible to make sure you get a response. Please be aware that some dilemmas may be posted on social media platforms and cannot be removed on there or Ask Oloni once submitted. Not all questions sent can be answered due to the high amount received daily. For a QUICK response book a private call here

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My boyfriend doesn’t know how too kiss lol 5. May 2015

Teach him, explain to him how you like it.. Have fun practising together. Be fun and cute with it.

Hi, I’ll try and cut the long story short as best as I can. I lost my V to a guy that I thought wanted to be with me but as time progressed things changed. We went through very turbulent situations in such a short space of time. He went from saying he liked me to the timing was not right to now stating he doesn’t want a girl and wants to still be good friends. I definitely feel mislead but happy I asked the ‘where do we stand question’ very early on, maybe to early? However, being friends with him is proving difficult, because sometimes the temptation to revert back to how we were is there, but not being friends is difficult to. I’m trying to move forward but a lot of my friends are saying that I should be with another person intimately to get over everything. I personally don’t feel like that’s the solution, on the other hand, I really want to get over him and the situation. 5. May 2015

The longer you have him around or even in your space as a ‘friend’ the harder things will be. I know so many scenarios such as this where women find themselves returning, especially after being played with emotionally.

What do you want? If it’s someone to be with sexually then you can go elsewhere. If it’s happiness, having him around wont give you that. Instead you’ll be going around in circles. Don’t do that to yourself.

I’m seeing this white guy, he’s cool and everything but I’ve recently seen on his phone that he has a dating website on his phone. Is that a red light or ? 5. May 2015

Well you’re ‘seeing’ him so, no.

What’s your views on no sex before marriage. Does it really work? My girlfriend and I have been dating (under a year) and she’s a virgin (19) but I (23) am not. There’s been involvement with foreplay and oral sex in the past but not any more as we’ve talked due to reglious/faith reasons we’ve stopped all the sexual stuff as she wished. We love each other very much and I can see a future together… Moreover, what if I became sexually frustrated and temptation comes along. What if we don’t make it till death do us part vow/marriage/wedlock… Anyways can this work? Will this work? Would we be able to compromise in the near future if needed? Bottom line, will it be worthwhile sacrifice. I know you’re not a physic (I’m probably answering half these questions already myself) but you are a great sex and relationship expert. Any advise/help would be greatful Oloni. P.s. With all the situationships happening nowadays such as broken hearts, people getting played, catching STDs, pregnant and ABC sexing XYZ I am slyly greatful I have a rare potential who is willing to grow with me beyond sex itself. Well for now, I hope. Thanks in advance! 5. May 2015

Sex before marriage does work, it just takes commitment. I know we live in a society where sex is literally plastered everywhere, but if you’re dedicated you can resist the temptation. Saying that I also believe celibacy wasn’t made for everyone, there are those who are so in touch with their sexuality and wouldn’t be able to commit to that.

It all boils down to the both of you, temptation will always be out there as mentioned, even if you’re having sex 5 times a day with each other. There will always be lips, hips, thighs, breasts etc etc.

Don’t forget that the whole sex before marriage tradition was obviously in the olden days and couples were usually much more younger and weren’t in a relationship for such a lengthy time such as today.

If it’s worth it.. no excuse me, if she is worth it you’ll make that sacrifice.

Would you recommend a break if things aren’t going so well in a relationship? If you do, for how long? 5. May 2015

I wouldn’t recommend a break, just a day breather. After that try to discuss and figure out what the root of the problem is.

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