Ask me sex and relationship questions here anonymously. Please make questions as *brief* as possible to make sure you get a response. Please be aware that some dilemmas may be posted on social media platforms and cannot be removed on there or Ask Oloni once submitted. Not all questions sent can be answered due to the high amount received daily. For a QUICK response book aprivate callhere
me and a guy who were in uni together were talking for about 5months. I lost my virginity to him after our 3rd month seeing each other. I cut off all communication with him in february after learning he was still speaking to his ex (they were trying to work things out). Last week he messaged me “Just passing thru” just checkin on me type text. After no communication after all those months why would he want to speak to me. I also recently saw his post on IG where he posted her as wcw. I was getting over him until he messaged me this is extremely hard. Question 1) why do you think he messaged me if he is now happy with his girlfriend? he hurt me so bad. I even randomly text him a few days ago telling him I hate him. I just want to be over it. Question 2) How can I get over it? How do i forget and move on? **
20. May 2015
Sorry to hear you about your experience with this this dude. It happens to a lot of us and it’s sad. I know it’s playing on your mind and you probably have more than two questions going through your head, but the honest truth is, these are just the actions of a guy who is no good. I’m not sure of the ins and the outs of your time seeing this guy.. so its hard to decipher if he was genuinely interested and probably lost it….Or if he was wasting your time.
1. Don’t look too deep into why he messaged you. Exs/last love interests have a knack for messaging women after things fizzle out (usually 3 MONTHS, it always THREE MONTHS!) No idea why, it’s sort of like the ‘Hey stranger’ text. It means nothing but seeing if he can still eat his cake.
2. Get over it by teaching yourself how you will heal from this. Do not let one fucked up situation hurt you so badly, that you look at ll men the same. Keep yourself busy and also purchase a copy of my new eBook ‘100 Questions’ https://simplyoloni.com/product/100-questions/
(**) I was linking/seeing a guy I truely like for a year and a bit now, we had a lil break (August 2014) until October. But from March until this day he keeps making excuses when it comes to meet up( bare in mind I used to see him once a month for an HOUR) then in April he said we shall be meeting up once a week. But during April times, he’s been going through a lot( family member got arrested) so I told him that we could start meeting up from the first week of May, so he said alright. It is now may and still I haven’t spent time with him. The 4th of may I asked him about meeting up once a week starting from May and he said he’s has other things to do with his time, like focus on his family( cause of the family member in prison) so I got annoyed with how it was said so on the 5th of May. i wrote him a long paragraph explaining how I feel, how we dont have a connection etc etc and he asked can we be friends and I told him no because I don’t do friends with any sort of ex. Was I being selfish or is he stringing me along?
20. May 2015
He’s not stringing you along exactly. You should have taken the hint. If he wanted to see you, you wouldn’t need to constantly ask. If he wanted it to happen it would have happened. He asked to be friends, you said no and that’s fine you’re not obliged to be friends since it’s clear you feel he’s wasted your time.
Hi oloni I have seen U made my question, qotd the problem is I have told him I didn’t like him bringing girls over, cause if it was the other way round he wouldn’t like it but he was very adamant about his decision and for those saying he might live in a studio or not.. He doesn’t he lives in a full blown house with a living room and everything but if people think they would be happy with their guy/girl with the opposite sex alone in a room. Good luck on them because it’s not about insecurities or trust issues its about respecting me the way I respect him
20. May 2015
This is exactly what I said, thanks for explaining.
I don’t know why but boys don’t like me. The ones I like never like me back and others friend zone, it’s really not fair, a lot of my friend’s are in relationships and I always feel left out. I’ve been told to act like I don’t want someone in my life but whether I act like it or not, it never makes a difference, people never approach me. I get that the egg doesn’t swim to the sperm but I’ve even tried like giving hints and stuff but yet there’s no response. I’m at this stage where I feel I’ll never be with someone. I know it’s sounds deep but I just don’t see myself having a chance with anyone ever again.
20. May 2015
I’m sure there are guys out there who would love to be given the opportunity to date you. Problem is you’re probably looking in the same place and getting the same results. I’m going to guess you’re in your early/mid 20’s just by the facts of my blogs demographics, so calm down! This is also more of a relationship coaching question, so email me if you’re interested.
How do you tell the person you’ve been with for two and a half years that you don’t feel s connection anymore and that you think it’s best you separate for good? It has gone to the point where his presence annoys me. He cheated on me in our first year together and I forgave him but for some reason I think every little thing had built up and I’m constantly unhappy. Maybe it’s a phase I’m going through but I need to find a way to be happy again 😢
20. May 2015
You sit down and speak to him, let him know how you feel. ‘I’m not happy any more and I’ve felt like this for a while’.
It’s okay to leave something that no longer makes you smile or brings you joy.
Subscribe To Our Newsletter
Sign up to our mailing list to read our sex and relationship features first.
You have Successfully Subscribed!