Hey oloni. My boyfriend never posts me on his social media and it’s been bothering me because he’s quite active online and posts everything else about his life. My particular issue is snapchat where I’ve caught him in girls DMs before and he’s able to get away with them thinking he’s single because he never shows me as his gf. I’ve confronted him about it and the fact he doesn’t show me off but nothing’s changed. Our friends and some people in Uni know about our relationship but I don’t feel like it’s enough. He is a good boyfriend mostly and I feel like him not posting me on his social media isn’t enough to break up with him so What else can I do besides talking to him again about it?
3. May 2017
That’s all you can do I’m afraid. Talk to him and let you know how you feel about it.
Oloni
Hi Oloni, I’ve been together with my boyfriend for 2 years and a few months. Everything has been fine up until around march 2017 where he started to get angry at me about the smallest things to a point where he has thrown items at me and used rude words such as ‘bitch’ etc. It has happened 3 times so far. I do love him and he does apologise but I don’t know how genuine these apologies are if they keep happening. I don’t know what to do because it keeps happening and he thinks once he’s apologised we can just move on and ignore that. Besides that, the relationship is cool and fun as it should be but that specific thing is what’s eating at me.
3. May 2017
Hey love, what you’re going through is verbal and physical abuse and it’s important you leave this relationship immediately. You should never have to deal with either of it, as it’s very unhealthy and extremely damaging.
Oloni
Hi Oloni, I’ve been seeing this girl for about 3 months. Not yet made it official but we talk everyday and have sex and that. Anyway in the 3 months we’ve barely had an argument then suddenly she loses her shit when she finds out I’ve got 3 close female friends. My friends did nothing to her and never spoke to her but she got mad because in her last relationship her ex’s friends made life hard for her. I told her that every situation is different and she was overreacting but anyway she said she didn’t want to see me again. It’s been about a week now and I lowkey miss her but realistically what can I do because I can’t cut off my friends for this one girl.
3. May 2017
Heya! It sounds like she’s carrying her baggage and insecurities into this relationship. I don’t think you should cut off your friendship with these women, especially if you have no reason to.
What you need to understand is that your relationship will not work if she has these feelings. The best thing I’d advice is to give her a call and see if she can have a better understanding.
Oloni
Hi oloni, I just want to clarify some things. I asked for advice about the AJ thing. To all the women saying I probably fawn over Instagram models that’s not true. I hardly ever use the app. I’m not like that. And it is serious, she was retweeting all types of tweets and making comments about Anthony Joshua and how is that meant to make me feel? I’ve never done something disrespectful like this before and she made it out as if it wasn’t that deep. She Still hasn’t apologised. I dunno what happened to her on that day but I decided to go on a break(it’s not just about the AJ tweets) because she was being ridiculously disrespectful for no reason. Ask your female followers if they’d feel disrespected if their boyfriend made all types of sexual comments about attractive instagram models or celebs saying “I’ll risk it all” for another woman. I’m certain if it was the other way around many would come to her defence so why am I now a joke because I feel a type of way about this? Anyways thanks for your response at least
2. May 2017
Thank you for writing in again. That’s the thing with my platform, everyone is anonymous so no one (incl myself) will ever know who the dilemma involves. As I mentioned, you have every right to feel the way you do and if she doesn’t realise it, then the both of you clearly don’t have the same level of respect for each other.
Oloni
READ: Why I Decided To Stop Faking My Orgasms
Hi Oloni..so over the summer I was kind of desperate to lose my virginity so I tried to hook up with this guy I barely knew. We had hung out once and he seemed pretty cool so we attempted to have sex in his car. Here’s the thing…he couldn’t penetrate me. He told me to sit on it and all I felt was an excruciating pain and it wouldn’t even go in. Keep in mind I have never worn tampons prior and wasn’t really familiar with my vagina. His car was pretty tight so I don’t know if me not spreading my legs wide enough was the problem..or if my hymen was too tough…or my hole was too small. And it was dark so the guy did anal by accident which bled a little. I’ve been scared to attempt to have sex again. What should I do? Should I try to break my hymen on my own? Or are there any positions you recommend for losing my virginity or any tips to make it less painful. I know this is a a lot but I am 21 and I am ashamed that I am not having sex like everyone else. Thanks Oloni
1. May 2017
Hey love! Take a BIG deep breath. First I need you ask yourself, why you’re so in a rush to lose your virginity. Is it for yourself or to add to a conversation full of people who are already sexually experienced?
If it’s the latter then you’re doing it for the wrong reasons.
A lot of people don’t know this, but the pain you experience when having vaginal sex isn’t caused by your hymen ‘breaking’, so don’t worry about that.
Get to know your body a bit better and if you’re really ready to have sex, try 15-20 minutes of foreplay then stick to the missionary position as you’ll feel more relaxed.
If you’d like to be hear more about sexuality, come down to laid bare this month. Tickets have nearly gone.
Oloni
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