The Wife Me Phase
I’ve been meaning to write this blog for such a long time only because I feel like so many young women go through a phase when wanting a boyfriend. The ‘Wife Me’ phase. The phase of changing themselves to fit under the description and category of what they feel a man might desire more.
It is often believed that we have to change ourselves in order for a guy to take us seriously and more willing to commit. There are so many women who ask me regularly ‘Oloni how do I get him to be my man?’ Instead of asking themselves what HE has to BE, before you make him your boyfriend.
I once had a friend named Maria who was dating a guy for over 7 months, yes dating, at no point was this guy budging to make things official. Maria and I often spoke about the direction of where her relationship was going and to be quite honest it was clear there wasn’t one. I noticed changes in my bubbly friend who used to hit the town with me and party. For one, the partying stopped and so did the drinking. We could argue and say perhaps it was her just her growing up and rightfully so, but that observation was just one of many things she did to try and impress the guy she was dating. After they broke up she finally came out of her shell and the wine tasting began all over again.
This is just one example of things women find themselves doing so they can find a male companion. The fact that so many ladies out there assume you have to be or act a certain way because they think it might lead to a relationship is absolute BS. You can’t fake being someone in order for someone else to like you, I mean sure we try to watch Naruto or the latest cool animes out of interest, because the dude we’re seeing likes it. That’s absolutely fine, but I’m talking about becoming a whole different person or even emphasising on your qualities that you possess. No idea what I’m talking about? For some time there has been an infamous hashtag on Twitter called #HusbandHunters this was used when women would often tweet about the things they bring to the table if they were in a relationship. Submitting to men who know nothing of their existence and practically advertising themselves with no bidders. It’s as if we’re so ready to be all we can be for another soul, instead of being all we can be for ourselves.
I spoke to a friend of mine @Unkle_K and asked what his thoughts were. He said: ‘A woman will get with a man and not because he’s even worth her value, but because she needs to complete this image of a perfect woman.’
Interesting right? I know.
I’m sure this goes without saying, but even though there are women who fall under this category. There are also women who don’t. Women who aren’t the slightest bit interested in labels within a relationship, every Casanova’s dream.
I’ll admit it, I went through this phase pretending I could cook when my culinary skills are incredibly basic, and I’m in a relationship. ‘What your point Oloni?’. . well aren’t you reading? My point is that you don’t need to change who you are or be someone you’re not just so you can tick the ‘in the relationship’ status box on Facebook. Do people even do that anymore? Actually I think it’s been replaced with #MCEM (Man Crush Everyday Monday)
