6 Reasons Why You Wouldn’t Want Him To Leave His Girlfriend For You

You have found out your exclusive relationship isn’t so exclusive. So, now what? Maybe you have decided to swiftly remove yourself from the situation and get on with your life or you might feel like you are stuck in limbo when it comes to deciding your next move. You know what he did was wrong but you have invested a lot of time and emotion into the relationship – time you can’t get back and emotions you are pretty much stuck with until you can get over him. However we all know that despite the fact that you may not be in control of your emotions you are definitely in control of what you tolerate. But what if he is not even letting you move on? He may be pursuing reconciliation so resiliently that it causes you to wonder whether he truly made a mistake, maybe he truly did fall for you while he was with someone else, maybe he really is going to leave her like he is insisting to you, maybe he really does need a little more time…maybe you should wait? You probably already know what to do but you need a little reminding of reasons why continuing to be in a relationship like this might not be the best of choices so here are six:

 

Your previous relationship was based on a lie:

The trust has been compromised and rebuilding trust can take time and spark feelings of doubts and resentment. You might even be refusing to acknowledge these feelings towards your relationship because you feel that as soon as the girlfriend is out of the way things can go back to the way they were. But it is important to accept the fact that everything you once knew is not how it was and to keep in mind the saying, “how you get them is how you lose them,” while you make your decision because the tables turn at their own time – do not force it to turn in the direction you want them to turn because of instant gratification disguised as long-term satisfaction.

 

Your ego probably wants him more than you do:

Ask yourself if you really still want him or do you just want him to choose you? Recognise if your feelings are really causing you to chase the title or if your ego has fully taken over the situation and you don’t just subconsciously want to be chosen because you found out you were not the only option. It’s almost as if being the best has kicked into overdrive. You know the situation is wrong but…how could he not choose you?

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Remember that he would still be fresh out of a relationship:

Yes, he may have been with you while he was with her but he is still a man who was in a relationship that would be diving straight into a new one after a break-up, which means there is baggage. What if his girlfriend is also finding it difficult to let go? What if he finds himself unable to make up his mind between the two of your because he “wants both”? Do you really want to put yourself in a situation where it is not just you?

You know what he is like when he cheats:

This leads on to my next set of questions for you how do you know he won’t cheat on you too? How do you know that you were the only side? How can you be so sure that you can believe and put trust in something involving him again? It’s important to remember that you have witnessed first hand the way he behaves when he cheats. He is able to conjure a fresh, new relationship with another person while he is supposed to be committed to someone else. Remember he cheated on his girlfriend…and you would now be the girlfriend…so now there is a position available for your old spot. If he fools you once it is a lesson – if he fools you again – did he really fool you or are you just a fool?

 

Believing you are the exception to the rule is risky:

It could be true – but are you willing to take that risk? Has he told you that he didn’t love her but he loves you and will be faithful to you? You’re the woman who can truly change him? Or my personal favourite – he wants to change for you? Yes, you could be part of the motivation for change but you shouldn’t be the only reason he wants to change. He is not really changing for himself if he’s doing it for you. That is forcing someone to be a certain way to make you comfortable by making himself uncomfortable. It is only a matter of time before he reverts back to his old ways.

 

Do you really know him?

There is probably a whole other side of him that you don’t know you may have felt that you were in a relationship before but it is not the same. He said and done what he needed to do to get you to be with him while he was with someone else.

So with that being said let me leave you with one final thought to conclude this post: once the thrill of this new, refreshed chase is gone…how do you know he won’t be?

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