Is Good Sex More Important Than A Good Relationship?
When it comes to relationships, what is more important to you? Good sex, or a healthy relationship? And is it possible to have one without the other?
No, I don’t think you have to choose between the two. I believe you can have both. But what if the relationship turns sour but the sex remains the same? Would you compromise your happiness for the passionate thrill that is experienced in the bedroom? Maybe that’s what happiness consists of for you?… Each to their own I suppose.
One of our readers here at Simply Oloni expressed that she had been in a 3 year relationship that turned sour in its 2nd year. After making it through infidelity issues, family problems and soo much more, the intellectual spark between the two of them died out. The conversation lacked enthusiasm, their interest in each other died a brutal death and after the cheating, the trust disappeared. The only connection that remained was in between the sheets.
“I’m not happy, and I know I got to get out, but the sex keeps me around… What if I never find anybody who understands my body like he does?”
She had me wondering… How important is good sex in a relationship? And does it trump the importance of a good/healthy relationship?
Unfortunately for me, this wasn’t the first time I heard a situation like this.
I had a friend who was still in love with her ex. They both wanted to get back together and make things work, but she couldn’t let go of the current interest because of the sex… She knew that sex with the ex wouldn’t be as good is it is now, despite having no real feelings for the current.
Are those 5-30mins of sheer ecstasy worth irreplaceable time given to someone you do not love/have no real feelings for? I’m actually not sure if that says something about the person more than it does about the relationship.
In my opinion, when it comes to a having a healthy relationship, all needs have to be met. Not just the physical aspect.
If you substitute true companionship for the physical just to gratify yourself for a moment, you can soon find that your once beautiful relationship has turned into a ‘friends with benefits’ scenario or even worse, you may find you’re sleeping with an enemy.
What is a relationship that is based on ‘me’ first, rather than ‘us’ first?
Self-gratification cannot be the focus. Eventually, you’ll leave in search of something more meaningful.
If you took the sex completely out of the relationship, would you still have a desire for that person? Would a friendship still remain?
