Dealing With Bad Sex
Great conversation, love their company, intellectually stimulating, but… the sex is just not doing it for you.
Everyone in every relationship will have experienced disappointing sex at some point (unless you’re just that amazing!) but it’s not always easy to have that conversation. You don’t want to hurt your partner’s feelings or damage their confidence but something just has to be done.
Bad sex can ruin your intimacy. It can make sex become a chore instead of an enjoyable experience for the both of you.
Simply Oloni spoke to a few guys about this to get their opinions on the matter.
Josh, 22, London, said: “If my girl isn’t feeling my moves in the bedroom, then I’d just want to know. What if She’s laughing about me to her friends?”
This is much easier said than done. Firstly, because not everyone’s ego can take being told their sex game is terrible, and secondly because it can ruin intimacy even more as your partner may be in fear that your sex life is being discussed like the latest episode of Eastenders.
We also can’t forget that some people experiences of bad sex comes from casual relationships or one night stands – so how exactly can you approach that kind of situation appropriately?
It is important to clarify what bad sex is.
Bad sex is not just about not having a clue as to what you’re doing. It can also be about your attitude. Do you always receive but never want to give? Do you lack spontaneity and always go for the same old routine and positions? Do you always miss out foreplay?
All of these things are important for maintaining a healthy sex life.
The easiest way to get over these issues is to make helpful suggestions: ie, ‘that’s the spot… I really like it when you do…next time can we…” You can also initiate the changes you want to see! If you want to try more positions then maybe you can show your partner one you’ve been wanting to do for ages.
Sex is supposed to be fun. So you don’t have to sit down and write a list about the specifics or argue about it. Go with the flow and help your partner to help you. That way you are saving the embarrassment for the both of you.
How have you dealt with bad sex in the past?
