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Ask me sex and relationship questions here anonymouslyPlease make questions as *brief* as possible to make sure you get a response. Please be aware that some dilemmas may be posted on social media platforms and cannot be removed on there or Ask Oloni once submitted. Not all questions sent can be answered due to the high amount received daily. For a QUICK response book a private call here

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My boyfriend always made out he wasn’t in contact with any of his ex’s. However recently he’s changed his tune & told me he’s very close to one of his ex’s family. He’s always round there helping the family out, & chilling with her siblings, but swears blind he doesn’t see her or talk to her. How is that even possible when he’s in her house? She recently contacted him asking him for a favour, and he met up with her. He said it isn’t a big deal but he failed to tell me & I found out through someone else. Does this sound shady to you, or am I as he said paranoid? 17. May 2015

He’s being shady as fuck. You need to sit him down and have a very lengthy discussion about how inappropriate his actions are towards you. What favour does his ex need and why can’t she ask her dad?

His ex and his ex’s family should not be his concern. It’s disrespectful towards YOUR  relationship.


I have been seeing someone for about 6 months now, but we have sex every time we meet although we don’t meet often. He’s never taken me out or offered to , he did cook for me last time I met him. We use to talk everyday but we hardly speak now as he uses uni as an excuse not to. I think he’s using me, should I have the talk of where we are heading or just leave it as I have rejected couple date offer from other guys. What do you think I should do Oloni? 17. May 2015

He’s not as interested as you are. Call it off and spend time dating others.


How do i deal with virginity pain, only had sex once and it killed 17. May 2015

Try a lot of foreplay before you get straight into things, also try and use lube as the moistness also helps.


Hi Oloni, I’m wondering if you can give me some guidance on a situation. So here it is….I thought I found an amazing guy he’s smart, funny, kind, good looking… To say the least I thought I had “won” I lost my virginity to him, it was only last year I was 22. I’ve had boyfriends in the past but no one ever moved me like he did. I wasn’t willing to give it up for just anyone and I thought he was different. I can’t begin to explain how comfortable I was with this person, I really did think we were meant for each other… Then he left me, we were on 2 different paths and distance was an issue… Now it’s over and I found out from a mutual friend that he had been seeing other girls when we were together. I’m broken. I’ve never got to this point with someone where I gave my everything to them and be to hurt this badly. I think it’s important to note how I am as a person: I’m a strong believer in the fact young relationships do not work, I would put my work and dreams ahead of a man and I don’t really believe that relationships last forever. But still I gave my everything to this boy and I really thought it would work, I’m very reserved I don’t particularly let people know about what occurs in my life but I let him in. I told him everything and would have done anything for him. Before him I would pay no attention to guys I was a firm believer in getting yourself all the way together before sharing your life with someone… I don’t know how to deal with heartbreak. I’ve never been hurt like this and it’s affecting everything, I can’t stop crying (something I never do) and I hate the fact that I’m crying over a guy. How do you deal with the fact that you gave your everything to someone and it still wasn’t enough? I haven’t confronted him about the fact I know what he’s done, we don’t speak anymore I don’t know if it’s worth mentioning? I just want to be happy again and there’s a sick part of me that wants to just pretend that I don’t know what’s happened and just let it go… Like I said previously I don’t discuss things that occur in my life with anyone so my friends aren’t even aware… I really don’t have anyone to turn to and believe me I’m really not the type to ask for help especially when it’s from someone I don’t know but here I am asking for your advice haha…please if there’s anything you can say for it to just stop the pain I’d be more than happy to hear it (I would really appreciate it if this stayed off Twitter) x 17. May 2015

Hey love. first of all realise, you are not alone millions of us have experiences such heartbreak. You think someone is your all and love them only to realise.. yes, this person is human, yes, this person is capable of hurting me.

What you shouldn’t do and also learn from this, is to never let your happiness depend on another soul. Right now you’re going through a process or hurt, betrayal and anger, so it’s okay to cry, it’s okay to have a hundred things going through your mind. What I always tell people when they’ve come out of a very emotional break up is to keep yourself busy and to be around those who love you.

You may find this hard to believe now, but you will be okay, after all there was life before you met him.

I wouldn’t suggest you contact him and let him know what you found out, I just want you to heal and get through this process. Nothing positive will come from it.


Hey oloni, I love what you’re doing!. I just wanted to ask, how do I get over my ex? I thought I was over him till I found out he had a new girlfriend, it really upset me because when we were seeing each other I never got the full girlfriend title even tho I got introduced to his family and when with me he also said he couldn’t do the long distance but his new gf is also distant as their unis ain’t as close to each other? Am I being selfish because I feel like this? I mean he seems really happy now I’m just sad I couldn’t be the one. I feel like he’s the real reason I haven’t been able to start something new with anyone else 17. May 2015

Hey love! If you get a copy of 100 Questions all the answers you need are there: https://simplyoloni.com/product/100-questions/


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