Ask me sex and relationship questions here anonymously. Please make questions as *brief* as possible to make sure you get a response. Please be aware that some dilemmas may be posted on social media platforms and cannot be removed on there or Ask Oloni once submitted. Not all questions sent can be answered due to the high amount received daily. For a QUICK response book aprivate callhere
Since I found out who my boyfriends ex was I’ve been feeling a lot more insecure with my body than ever before. I mean she’s a 10 physically and I would say I’m a 7.5 but facially its vice versa. thats not good enough for me. I would really love to feel that he upgraded with me and I’m actually willing to do what it takes (no surgeries though lol) to get my body to a level that i would feel more comfortable and confident with. Am i crazy for thinking this? I haven’t talked to anyone about this cos i feel they’ll think I’m mad, lol. Do you have any advice for me?
22. June 2015
My love, you shouldn’t care if your bf’s ex looks like Taz Mania. Her beauty is not your concern. You’re clearly insecure forgetting WHY he is with you. Why are you talking about upgrading when his happiness stems from you? Do you know what that’s worth? Don’t get me wrong always make sure you look your best for your partner & YOURSELF by eating right, exercising, dressing well etc etc. but don’t let the past play with your future.
Hey Oloni, So I’ve been dating my current boyfriend for close to a year now, and we really are in love but the only problem is that he gets really jealous about ANYTHING and EVERYTHING! To add to that he gets really angry and when we have arguments he hurts me with his words but claims it out of love while apologising. Im not the type that has guy friends as i have cut a lot of them even before we started dating for my own reasons but it doesn’t mean i can’t reply to a few friendly ‘Hey. How are you. It’s been a while’ messages. We argue a lot about things like this and apparently so did him and his ex. I believe relationships are real hard work and because of this belief I’m not even sure if I am getting red lights to leave the relationship or green lights to go on in the hopes that it will all be worth it in the end. Please I could really use some of your advice.
22. June 2015
There is nothing about what you have written the screams ‘green light, this will be worth it in the end’. – He’s insecure and it’s affecting the health of this relationship. Unless you can sort this out and figure out WHY he has these issues the relationship will not progress properly. You shouldn’t have to fear talking to a few old or current friends because of his own problems. Speak to him.
I have been with my boyfriend for almost 2 years. Everything was going fine until he went to a female friends house and stayed there until very late at night. I didn’t mind that he was at her house as he was with another male friend which made me feel a lot more comfortable with the situation. The problem started when he told me he was going to be home at a certain time and was still at her house at that time after he had texted me that he was on his way home. I then later found out via snapchat that him and his friend were in her bedroom with her while she was getting ready. He said she wasn’t getting dressed and was only doing her makeup. Personally I think that it is very disrespectful to me for him to be in her bedroom period. I have told him I don’t mind them being friends and him going out to chill with her but I no longer want him going to her house. He then agreed that he would not go to her house until i feel comfortable with it. Is it wrong for me to be tough on him for wanting to go to other girls house’s late hours? Even though I’ve told him I’m not comfortable with it and then it pops up in conversation every now and then it seems as if it’s still bugging him.
22. June 2015
If it makes you uncomfortable, then it makes you uncomfortable. He was wrong for lying about his whereabouts, but since you’ve told him how you feel, the fact this shouldn’t be something that bugs him, instead it should be understable. When you’re in a relationship, some things can be seem and felt as inappropriate. This is one of them.
My boyfriend has been acting distant lately. We could go a couple of days without taking, but I known he still cares about us.Lately I’ve been talking to a guy I’ve had history with more than I talk to my boyfriend. Even though it’s all innocent and no cheating has occurred, I feel it’s not right. Am I at fault for entertaining him or is my boyfriend at fault for been distant ?
22. June 2015
You’re after attention & that’s fine and completelty natural, especially when you’re in a relationship. Entertaining this other guy will only make things complicated, sort out the issue with your partner and talk to him. Ask him questions, let him know how you feel in the relationship. I hope all goes well.
Okay soo this is deep! Me and my current boyfriend have been together for 18months. Since day one all we do is argue, I’m not the argumentative type of person but since I’ve been with him it’s made me feel like I have to argue back in order to get my point across. This is where I’m stuck; recently my ex boyfriend and I have been talking we even met up and the spark we had before be broke up was electric. We had a little intimate moment and we kissed but that was all!! The feeling I have for my ex are way more than I’ve ever felt for my current boyfriend. I know my current relationship isint working and I’m not 100% happy but I don’t want to leave my current relationship for my ex and it might not even work out. What do I do?
21. June 2015
It’s clear you cheated due to being unhappy, but that’s not an excuse. If things weren’t going right, you should have taken a step back and thought about your situation properly. Now you have to talk your partner and let him know what happened. As for getting back with your ex, think about that carefully and ask yourself why you broke up in the first place. Never allow an ex to be emotional comfort. Ever.
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