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Hey, my boy friend and I are going on holiday soon and we’re both trying to celibate and wait for marriage however how I think I want to give myself to him. How do I do this without him feeling bad? I don’t want him to think that I thought he only took me on this holiday to sleep with me, plus if we do sleep together, does it mean we have to continue sleeping together? 20. May 2015

How you choose to continue having sex is up to you both. Speak to him.


I’m speaking to this guy, & everything is going fine so far, however I’ve heard a lot of rumours about him having a girlfriend & sleeping around with a few girls in my uni, he also cheated in the past. I have confronted him about all of this & he denies having a girlfriend but admitted to cheating in the past, I know he also slept with one of my friend (not close friend) a few years ago, he’s a really nice guy but I’m really not comfortable with all of the information I know & every time we are together it feels so wrong & I’m also hiding the fact that I’m talking to him from my friends cause I know they wouldn’t approve, he promised that he’s changed and that he wants to be with me, but I really don’t know what to believe?? Help me plss x 20. May 2015

If you don’t feel comfortable with this guy, the relationship you’re trying to build will not work. You’re not even together yet and you feel this way.


If a the father of my child allows his girlfriend to disrespect myself and his own child on social media what do I do? Do I act like a crazy baby mum or do I leave it to God? For someone who is well known on social media should he be allowed to get away with this? 20. May 2015

Get off the internet and talk to the father of your child. Nothing ever gets resolved online.


me and a guy who were in uni together were talking for about 5months. I lost my virginity to him after our 3rd month seeing each other. I cut off all communication with him in february after learning he was still speaking to his ex (they were trying to work things out). Last week he messaged me “Just passing thru” just checkin on me type text. After no communication after all those months why would he want to speak to me. I also recently saw his post on IG where he posted her as wcw. I was getting over him until he messaged me this is extremely hard. Question 1) why do you think he messaged me if he is now happy with his girlfriend? he hurt me so bad. I even randomly text him a few days ago telling him I hate him. I just want to be over it. Question 2) How can I get over it? How do i forget and move on? ** 20. May 2015

Sorry to hear you about your experience with this this dude. It happens to a lot of us and it’s sad. I know it’s playing on your mind and you probably have more than two questions going through your head, but the honest truth is, these are just the actions of a guy who is no good. I’m not sure of the ins and the outs of your time seeing this guy.. so its hard to decipher if he was genuinely interested and probably lost it….Or if he was wasting your time.

1. Don’t look too deep into why he messaged you. Exs/last love interests have a knack for messaging women after things fizzle out (usually 3 MONTHS, it always THREE MONTHS!) No idea why, it’s sort of like the ‘Hey stranger’ text. It means nothing but seeing if he can still eat his cake.

2. Get over it by teaching yourself how you will heal from this. Do not let one fucked up situation hurt you so badly, that you look at ll men the same. Keep yourself busy and also purchase a copy of my new eBook ‘100 Questions’  http://simplyoloni.com/product/100-questions/


(**) I was linking/seeing a guy I truely like for a year and a bit now, we had a lil break (August 2014) until October. But from March until this day he keeps making excuses when it comes to meet up( bare in mind I used to see him once a month for an HOUR) then in April he said we shall be meeting up once a week. But during April times, he’s been going through a lot( family member got arrested) so I told him that we could start meeting up from the first week of May, so he said alright. It is now may and still I haven’t spent time with him. The 4th of may I asked him about meeting up once a week starting from May and he said he’s has other things to do with his time, like focus on his family( cause of the family member in prison) so I got annoyed with how it was said so on the 5th of May. i wrote him a long paragraph explaining how I feel, how we dont have a connection etc etc and he asked can we be friends and I told him no because I don’t do friends with any sort of ex. Was I being selfish or is he stringing me along? 20. May 2015

He’s not stringing you along exactly. You should have taken the hint. If he wanted to see you, you wouldn’t need to constantly ask. If he wanted it to happen it would have happened. He asked to be friends, you said no and that’s fine  you’re not obliged to be friends since it’s clear you feel he’s wasted your time.


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